Short Relapsed Poems

Peace love and hope
Said brother, kick the dope
I might have relapsed a time or two
But never thought I’d kick the booze
Was love so misguided that I
Sought peace in a semi-permanent
Disillusionment and drunken haze
And hope that there was still
An aspirin on the floor
And beer left for a hangover cure...

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For a moment we were in a pleasant place,
I was happy and everything was fine,
'til I relapsed on a thing called anger,
When thoughts of you crossed my mind,

It's tricky this thing called forgiveness,
So many grudges that I can't let go,
They're holding me down and burden my spirit,
Until anger is all I behold...

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Thoughts mend, bleed and blend.
Peace of mind I can't defend.
Another pill to pretend.
Sh**! I relapsed again
Complicit mind, blind.
I am fine.
Repeated phrase.
Meanwhile, dazed.
lost in haze, afraid.
Another pill, clear the fog.
Sh**! I relapsed again.
Every time I think I'm fine.
I need to go back in time.
Fix, fix, fix broken thought.
Another me can't be bought...

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Punctuated by the virtual fifth degree, 
 he placed his neck on the line,
 the sucking, pinching tidal wave to slip away from the soft comforts and relapsed boredom.

 The new, energized voices, never spelling the conventional way,
 the pages of books he'd read, once or twice, erased and reread, compounding and retreating back to proto-motion.

 The motion that is now, clear to him, a cog in a single machine....

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Lift your lashes, look me in the eye
for when you do, you cannot lie
eyes staring back, these tears will fall 
this is the last time, it's you who will crawl

never forget my face
it's in your disgrace
your arms i will not embrace
till the end, there is no race

in the end i collapsed
once again relapsed
forgive me what iv'e done
it is you that has wone

what i felt is not real
reality is all i feel
with words we can seal
with a look we can conceal...

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