She handed me a shandygaff which I took to right away.
Oh, me, oh, my, I was soon drunker than a tipsy sailor,
And singing better than I had for years. Songs were coming
Out of me the way leaves come off a tree in the fall, only louder.
I was terrific at “Old Dan Tucker,”
Fantastic at “My Country Tis of Thee”,
And my “Over the Rainbow” was a contender
For the Judy Garland prize of the century.
I was amazing! I was amusing! My whit was hilarious,
I was more fabulous than I had ever been in my life,
For two seconds, but then I dropped, and fell asleep on the floor.
There was a hush for a second as people stared.
My husband carried me home.
I dreamed of my glory for hours.
My singing prowess! My keen sense of humor.
I had shown them!
Having no idea that eight people I work with
Had spiked my drink “thinking it would be funny”.
And amusing? Luckily, two sips put me down before
I died of alcohol poisoning.
I was out for eleven hours, because I do not usually drink.
So thanks co-workers, for helping me miss the entire
Stupid Christmas party.
Back next year? What would be the point?
Categories:
shandygaff, jobs,
Form: Prose Poetry
I stayed above the
Shandygaff,
a sports bar
down an alley
off College Avenue,
State College, PA
Penn State.
The happy valley street's
were a nightly
swarm of milling
students.
Masses inebriated
Heels clicking
between Cafe 210,
Zeno's and us.
Downstairs served
one dollar drafts.
Fifty cents on fridays.
I used to go early
before the students,
to sit down by myself
and watch the old
eighties television
set with the bouncers
and early bird stragglers.
"Two please"
I'd order eyeing the
vinyl peeling off
of the worn lite wood
grained bar.
Leaving my red faux
leather cracked silver
stool.
I'd wander away when the
crowds came.
Walk down the alleyway
and disappear into the multitude.
Categories:
shandygaff, confusion, life, nostalgia, places,
Form: Free verse