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My Player is playing to Lose
My life's a fcking mess,
watching myself rapidly digress
it's outta control..
I'm so f*king stressed
I so badly want to change
But I'm already way too far from success
I let out a huge sigh
and stop holding my breath
Think to myself "what the frickin heck"
And just go with the flow
That I'm pretty sure nobody really knows
So stuck in my mind
Simultaneously racing
& slowly floating through time
Bc I'm in my self created dimension
.. it just doesn't exist
N every chance I have at happiness
my brain just resists
Kicking and screaming
Like it's not meant for my soul
Finally realizing I was created solely
to make others feel whole
Only feeling at home when alone
forever made to feel wrong
Been broken for so long
Strolling around blindly
with my life's theme song bumpin super strong
.. it's like I got stuck in this
"What the f*ck RUT"
and just accepted defeat
Not even tryna get up
counting each round
As I fade in & out
Hearing them yell "let the btch die"
"she's just a ghost in a shell"
Realizing the whole time
that it's been my own voice
speaking every word that I've heard
And this misery that surrounds me
has always been by choice
I was meant to feel pain
w/ only knowledge & life lessons to gain
I just thought this was a game
but knew my fate was already made
by whoever was playing the character with my name
.... who happens to fckng suck, by the way
Copyright ©
Molly Lamer
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