Rice is necessary for eating Chinese food, at least in America
So, if you have intention of stealing my rice when I am getting seconds
face my rice bowl retribution
You use so much make-up I cant tell the difference between you and fried rice
You are so entitled that you think Mexican rice should just cross our border
You have caused so many problems for me that I had to eat Indian technical rice
You are so cheap that I can buy two microwaveable rice packets for less
You are more corrupt than squid ink rice in my stomach
You are more unoriginal than Chinese rice
You think you are the best, you are like rice in North Korea
But news to you, you are less than the rice in my stomach
This is my rice bowl retribution
ALSO, WHO EATS RICE WITH SALMON SLICES
Categories:
microwaveable, satire,
Form: Free verse
The Jabberwock, the Jabberwock,
Beware, beware the Jabberwock!
When you be out in forest deep,
Secure in bed, awake, asleep,
Protected by superiority,
Cloaked within seniority,
Thinking you safe in your encampment,
It comes with magic and with enchantment;
It flies aflame through forest trees
And sweeps up idle employees.
Not one will prove to be saveable;
All will prove quite microwaveable.
And, though your troops be sore mismatched,
Though none return who be dispatched
To meet and fight this host chimeric,
The VORPAL BLADE, from times barbaric,
May yet defeat this beast malevolent;
In the end may prove prevalent.
So those of us who’s seen its eyes,
Those of us who are familiarized,
Who’ve smelt its horrid pungency,
Will waive our normal consultant’s fee
And offer you a special deal:
One vorpal sword, for just a steal.
Categories:
microwaveable, humorous,
Form: Rhyme