Long Gourmand Poems

Long Gourmand Poems. Below are the most popular long Gourmand by PoetrySoup Members. You can search for long Gourmand poems by poem length and keyword.


A Former Slender Man Deplores Weight Gain

I loathe shucking clothes,
(no matter eyes severely myopic)
in preparation for here goes
another warm shower quickly
relaxing this senescent
body ready to doze

soon after lathering
this blubbery body
most unwanted fat grows
on me, no matter healthy diet
of worms, or how I stand,
not so easy add a pose

zing losing battle – Mary Jo's
if and geeze us of bulge ill flattering
particularly quiverly, sans white
"WALL" tire tread fully goes
steely belted around lower
abdominal area like lava floes

siring unsightly expose
yore squishy Jew dish priestly
punchy,plasma paunchy, gristly...
pillow like marshmallows
fittingly, rotundly soundly
identical with other schlep

tin (tin tabulation) grungy hobos,
this lap pissed lard (lord) Who Lee
bemoaning, how ilk readily knows,
where unwanted bulky flab...
most detested - hence Corp Yule Lance
leaves noth thin to noblesse oblige,

know bull eats obese,
anorexia nervosa or chance
barking out orders reminiscent, when he
hapt tubby a caller at
weekly square and/or contra dance,
now requisitioned to insulate

and excessively enhance
body electric can be mushed
into likeness of fleshy France
or repurposed into expanse
resembling any country,

whose name Kants
be easily pronounced, and historical
events glommed together recognizable
as Ataturk with a lance
bequeathed to rule World advance
sing gluttony as his divine providence,

thus requires deep dish allegiance
(non - fiber - binding contract)
for eats and make decadent
every fleshpot gourmand
stretching cellular skein to capacitance

bestowing guaranteed deliverance
with their rolling
ballooning massive circumference
into orbit with Earthly moon officiant
eternal fondue irrelevance!


A Former Slender Man Lapsed Unitarian Anorexic

A former slender man (lapsed Unitarian anorexic)...
deplores adipose tissue gain

No Holiday music can soothe savage beast
washboard abdomen weight watcher's dream fleeced
skinny bag of lovely bones permanently leased
body snatcher somewhere amidst policed

madding crowd of carolers singing,
where mine sinking spirits ceased
rising today December 18th, 2020
analogous how unleavened bread
(i.e. matzo) lacks yeast.

I loathe shucking clothes,
(no matter eyes severely myopic)
in preparation for here goes
another warm shower quickly
relaxing this senescent
body ready to doze

soon after lathering
this blubbery body
most unwanted fat grows
on me, no matter healthy diet
of worms, or how I stand,
not so easy (Etsy) as add a pose

zing losing battle – Mary Jo's
if and geeze us of bulge ill flattering
particularly quiverly, sans white
"WALL" tire tread fully goes
steely belted around lower
abdominal area like lava floes

siring unsightly expose
yore squishy Jew dish priestly
punchy, plasma paunchy, gristly...
pillow like marshmallows
fittingly, rotundly soundly
identical with other schlep

tin (tin tabulation) grungy hobos,
this lap pissed lard (lord) Who Lee
bemoaning, how ilk readily knows,
where unwanted bulky flab...
most detested - hence Corp Yule Lance
leaves noth thin to noblesse oblige,

know bull eats obese,
anorexia nervosa or chance
barking out orders reminiscent, when he
hapt tubby a caller wannabe at
weekly square and/or contra dance,
now requisitioned to insulate

and excessively enhance
body electric can be mushed
into likeness of fleshy France
or repurposed into expanse
resembling any country,

whose name Kants
be easily pronounced, and historical
events glommed together recognizable
as Ataturk with a lance
bequeathed to rule World advance

sing gluttony as his divine providence,
thus requires deep dish allegiance
(non - fiber - binding contract)
for eats and make decadent
every fleshpot gourmand
stretching consumer cellular 
skein to capacitance

bestowing guaranteed deliverance
with their rolling
ballooning massive circumference
into orbit with Earthly moon officiant
eternal fondue irrelevance!
Form: Rhyme

I Relished Being Hungry For Leftover Thanksgiving Pop Slop Gloppy Grub First Helping

Hmm... on second thought
lemme join anorexic club
until rib cage protrudes taut and visible
doubling as drum to drub
synchronized within heart of darkness,
especially when electrocardiogram exhibits
absolute zero vital sign,
cardiac arrest translates
as cessation to lub dub,
hence yours truly

declared dead as doornail,
coroner report deems arrhythmia
directly linkedin to deliberate Machiavellian flub
courtesy the missus attempt to poison me
actually aborted cuz nanobots
loosed upon body gripped with rigor mortis,
a minor inconvenient truth
cuz odorless and tasteless deadly toxins
rendered me convalescing
from bout with death, an oxymoronic
former slenderman gourmand.

temporarily deceased
until said microscopic robots
avidly analogous to frenzied
figuratively hogtied pigs
buzzfeeding at a trough
creating porcine hubbub
invisible nanoids (0.1-10 micrometres)
accomplished programmed task
whereby fatal microbes they did scrub
away leaving me fit as a fiddle.

No matter she thoroughly, painstakingly
and lovingly didst strew
haphazardly she threw
leftovers together,
this blustery march like
November twenty six figuratively view
wing the remaining thirty plus days
of two thousand twenty one
thoroughly cooked in microwave until...
poor excuse for my meal appeared
with consistency of shoe leather.

Think the missus not afraid
of Virginia Woolf keen to experiment
treating me like the Gingerbread Hag would:
questionable resultant glop pantomimed
for my guessing pleasure
never figure out in bajillion years
as amateurish Marcel Marceau charade
performance courtesy the spouse,

an entrée she gave - yours truly
immediately sought to evade
me subsequently evincing
horrific puckered mealy mouth
as though I swallowed hand grenade
figurative exploding oral cavity
feeble futile gesticulation inveighed.
Form: Rhyme

Premium Member Sloth

Doomed are the meek and weak as they seek
simply not hard enough trying to feed and succeed
Money and glory does not grow on trees and
there only is hope when the forests are savaged
You cannot eat money but bulk aids digestion
and sloth unhappily impedes instant gratification

Instead lust for more there can never be enough of
a good thing so try bigger higher faster and accumulate
The new God and Goddess does not reward humility
modesty is never exposed when love replaces sex and
six heavenly virtues in this sense are truly quite enough

Set targets and drive performance to new heights
don’t forget to be envious because it allows motivation
No place to resent jealousy for desire inspires incentives

Covet everywhere and every when it must be yours
crave fancy and multiply because whatever is present
should be out there and in there right where it counts
Without competition markets won’t prosper and reap

Implement plenty of anger for it aids to shift blame
It helps to lay judgement and charges scathing critique

Take pride in your achievements because it propels
further effort whereas merely taking stock breeds stagnation

And last but not least in the wonderful feast remember
that gluttony is a misnomer for well executed consumption and glory
If all else fails redefine your taste be courageous and indulge
A true gourmand experiences with novel ideas and adventures

Eat the bastards skin them alive dissect their lean bodies
human flesh is quite exquisite fatten them up if you must
Whether they die in self-righteously imposed famines 
sow your luxurious garments in sweat shops and factories
sift through rubbish and scraps they are meant to expire and 
never too soon in an ethical quest to replenish your needs
Overpopulation will cease to exist and you are doing a 
wonderful service to humankind and most of all to yourself

So get going and don’t be a lazy indolent and apathetic sloth

26th October 2018

Inspired by the song Doomed by Perfect Circle

Premium Member thank you kratt brothers

Chris and Martin brought us biology, zoology and ecology.
They introduced scientific learning to us in a friendly, exciting way.
We learned to observe, detect and investigate from them.
Thank you Wild Kratts; thank you Sifaka Lemur.

Thank you Aviva Koi, Jimmy, Zach, Donita and Gourmand.
We raced to our TV sets to see the next episode.
Lions, crocodiles, falcons, elephants and rattlesnakes!
We learned the dangers of pollutants in oceans.

Sorry sea turtles, sorry baby sharks, sorry, just sorry.
I still remember almost every bit about some episodes.
The Kratt brothers showed us that science is not boring.
Opening up a new world for us,teaching an excitement to learning!


Big Ben chimes Bazball Zen

Big Ben chimes again
With Bazball zen
One of those men
From special stock
Shepherd of the flock
Hewn from strewn Volcanic rock

From New Zealand's Southern Isle
But only there for a wee while
Mighty flame haired flair laird 

Without doubt more about Blighty's North East
They forged this bellicose beast
Ripsnorting sporting cavorting squire  
Glutton & gourmand gorged feast

Test town crier
Puffed buffed chest
Inspire..burning
Proper copper topper
Churning fire..

Endless zest..desire
No dull lull
No bore draw
Simple...aspire
To score more!

It's not arcane
Stokes campaign & reign
Train like you're insane
Always entertain!

Remember us flounder 
In the gutter
Trounced...17 on the bounce 
Could we have found
Pound for pounder
Better all rounder

Nutter...go getter 
Sounder founder
Run rate record setter
Of the evolution
And revolution 
Of Test cricket

Toe to toe
Blow by blow
Heave ho
Give us a ticket

In the Baz ball or
Ben buzz grotto

Gung Ho motto

You will never know 
Till you give it a go!

The Fab Four is no more



The fab four...not Scouse superstar serenaders..

Stellar constellations of cricketing fascinations...

Connoisseur christened, humdinger harbingers..
 
Listen…whispers of willow wizardry whistle…glisten..

Skipper sorcery glow…celestial cerebral Martin Crowe..

Appetites whet..forget the quartet..for the fab four is no more..

Game's pantomime dame, Kohli...encores harangued..

Creeping crepuscular flaws…Virat’s ersatz career nadir scores..

Smith's sisyphean shuffles..flummoxed fossicking for form.. 

In mists of time..muffled murmurs of his prime...

Two remain....caressed nurdle nirvanas...nudges finessed...Kane..

Benjamin Button…old school whiffs…lyrical lever lullabies..

Rooted rhapsody riffs..gourmand & glutton..

Wallowing in echoes..aesthetic embers of the past...

Trained elbow craned....poetic flighty feet…

Silkily souffle sashays scream balletic....

Swishes so late, almost tardy...halcyon garlanded greats..

Third man tickles...soft hands court..behind cover cavort..

Wooing nooks...seducing crannies..scoreboard cooing..

Relished textbook looks..cherished record books..embellished..

Joe shuns Icarus...strums eclipsing Sachin's sun..

Kane’s hushed kudos..won’t boast..hums humility…..

Genius garnishing..legends..legacies..

So time “gentlemen” please..

Lachrymose Last Post toast.

Final round for Kane..Joe & Martin Crowe..

Late great host…ruminating perched proud.. 

Hankering..hollering with the crowd..

Illuminating a long white cloud..
Form: Rhyme

Nonpareil Les Belles Lettres Spellbinds

Nonpareil les belles-lettres spellbinds

Adherence regarding credo
to finish reading arbitrarily
self selected book beginning
to end silent promise made
otherwise, I experience guilt
analogous violating unwritten

law, said private oath binds me
against challenging non binding
unspoken promise additionally
never flipping thru pages reading
conclusion, viz aforementioned
unspoken vow never abrogated,

no contest when authored material
finds yours truly engrossed cover
to cover avast joyous kickstarted
linkedin magical nameless eye
opening imaginative adventure
and/or literature deemed among

timeless (cult) classics cherished,
marveled, treasured... analogous,
where taste buds appeased brimming
culinary decadence edifying gourmet
savory sweet treat (ideally NON GMO
gluten and MSG free) targeting aching

unclutched memory savoring verboten
childhood candied just desserts goodies
triggered courtesy painstakingly crafted
words acquiring unabashed kudos pièce
de résistance worth their literary weight
adrip with chewy, gooey, sugary, syrupy,

tasty... je nais se quoi orgasmic merciless
kneading indescribable gourmand eats
generating atavistic base primal grunts
and groans signal untethered animalistic
joie de vivre, how intoxicating to quaff
metaphorically brilliantly crafted lettered
epistles despite genre ordinarily ranking

less than favorite, but some fluke wormed
itself to choose bon appétit infusing aural
(if enunciated aloud as doth yours truly),
mental, spiritual, visual... delectation oft
times exultation unmatched if material
read more than one time synonymous to
to overindulge exceeding pleasure re:
body, mind, spirit triage with gluttony.
Form: Elegy

The World's streets are full of beats eats and treats C to G


On the roster for any thrill seeker in retro sneakers a eureka 

Salsa eats & beats dash from the speaker splash of paprika  

Anything else an imposter the don is chicharron in Costa Rica


Dominica tropical scenes greens means hullabaloo of callaloo


Equatorial Guinea don a pinny for panache of succotash tutorial


Who knew that Fiji do niche ceviche as good as you get in Peru

Decoder delish fish dish a glut of coconut and it’s called kokoda


Askance glance France may perchance be the gourmet dance

Escargot or Fruit De Mer to share the flair the care in a trance

Even in the present effervescent present food of the peasant

Cassoulet or tartiflette..pot au feu get a baguette jamon beurre

Concur not happenstance foody romance your soul will enhance  

 
 One could buckle or just chuckle as you gawk at a pork knuckle

Thick of neck sturdy nerdy stock eating speck or flock for hock

Out and about can’t flout the rule everything goes with sauerkraut

Old school burst all banger no clanger meat lubed into tubes wurst


Can’t scoff hats do doff to gourmand nirvana trough of jollof in Ghana

Phew not the voodoo or hoodoo crew but FuFu oh & some marijuana


Not a trend setter but better appetite whetter tomatoes with onions & feta

Deceives no peeves big hitter apricity of the simplicity.. pita & vine leaves

At your leisure forget the rest a beset treasure chest of pleasure and zest

Charter boat smarter gloat starter roe of cods food of the Gods Taramasalata  

Meek weak bleak then Greek geek tweak should seek best test for any guest
Form: Rhyme

Maniacal Madman Manacled Me

Ironclad choke hold tightened
around pencil necked geek
stranglehold noose asphyxiated
courtesy mailer daemon freak

specifically America Online
server gremlin sought out meek
resplendently attired as Doctor sheikh
wordsmith scouted out as weak

cussed link within human league
surprisingly springing thru Lenovo
external screen, simulating sneak
issuing nary soundcloud when tweek

king "FAKE" childish 
ploy regarding peek
a boo as preschool prankish charade,
emulating, feigning, gamboling as mystique.

Little did yours truly discern
unsavory fated deaf fete
incorporating cunning linguistic deceit,
whereat innocent naivete scourge did mete

undeserved pummeling thrashed thinker
savagely, sadistically, and sacrificially beat
mastah to bloody pulp frequent visitor
courtesy aforesaid web portal

unexpected encountering
heinous nemesis greet
ting this chap with
suspicious groovy and neat

out of vogue colloquialisms
circa nineteen seventies
dead giveaway handy dandy
blues clues poetic feet

toe tilly tubular (iambic pentameter)
maintaining quite exemplary
skill for Pete
sakes, blindsided,
hoodwinked, outsmarted...

mine acute intuitive
perception, albeit fleet
tin gully as laxative courses
thru lower gastrointestinal

tract analogous to
GoLytely/PEG Solution
preprepatory for gastroenterologist
to ass esse seat

of pants anatomy i.e.
derriere, whether polyps
populate and remove
if necessary tenamount

to separating chaff from wheat,
and if all's well that ends
well patient with sore tuckus,
nonetheless rearing

to experience healthy
gluteus maximus treat
ting him/herself to feast
like gourmand and eat...

dagnabbit blasting impish,
where dark shadows
house outer limits of twilight zone
pestiferous heterosexual binary

bugaboo with chutzpah
nabbed against gangland
style angry bird
twittering parakeet.

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