Long Crocker Poems

Long Crocker Poems. Below are the most popular long Crocker by PoetrySoup Members. You can search for long Crocker poems by poem length and keyword.


Premium Member My First Cookbook

my first cookbook was Betty Crocker
I hope they still sell it
the recipes were fun and easy
this was before I was forced to cook

I used to think cooking was fun
I made simple things
chocolate chip cookies
tidbits with cheese and sour cream

every ingredient in this cookbook was in our pantry
or our refrigerator
our mother kept a well-stocked home
I may try to look this cookbook up

I remember thinking it was fun to cook
and it was
when I was a child
and did not have to make three meals a day

I lost interest in cooking along the way
but if I had the Betty Crocker cookbook
maybe I could revive a bit of interest
I will look for it
Form: Narrative


Get out of my head mister chatterbox

Get out of my head mister chatterbox!

Ransacking treasure trove 
of maximum headroom.

To remedy a fate worse than death
or orange hair oaf becoming 
forty seventh president
or contracting one
of several viral diseases named pox
permeate heavy shut tight door 
with numerous deadbolts 
and sophisticated locks
and impossible mission to out fox
analogous to roach infestation,
who favor nesting within custom made
Roper men's shoes brand name Docks.

Upon prima facie first blush
me mind's eye all atwitter,
sans long forgotten
"FAKE" sexual exploits
set mum (chrysos anthem) all aglitter,
boot like short order cook I hapt tubby
quickly realized trumpeting collusion,
a near fatal collision course
with Das scribe's antimatter
caw zing friggin insomnia

finding ma noggin scrambled
likesome lithesome cockamamie critter
whipped into frenzy
like battered butter
holy grits, alm manned 
in fight of ma life
cause I haint acquitter
baa (jaw edge), ah woe cup feeling
hedged hog extremely bushed 'n bitter,
this raging red bull inside me mind,

now body wheeling wickety wack,
lichen to moss elf gut seasonal litter
bitta asthma - insides
got balled into wah racket
like quietly rioting unfetter
herd plain tennis (see) hens,
gone south tub bespatter
ear rilly jawboning jabberwocky
reducing gray matter,
and all flesh sundered

into meaty platter
to pulverized, irradiated,
cremated... faux fluffernutter batter
analogous tummy Aunt
Jemima's famous flapjacks,
she fantastically fashioned better
than Betty Crocker
tossing spatulated glommed
gook suitable as bonesetter
high as the Taj Mahal,

while she merrily jabbered,
her native patois singsong blatter
all this inaudible clatter
muffled 10,000 maniacs mad as a hatter
madly clangorous dinner cowbells
aroused bacchanalian sybaritic skitter
ring jitterbugging fantasies
of barenaked ladies doth splutter
as bedraggled, frazzled, grizzled...poetry
like cocky rooster that did stutter!

Premium Member Barry Crocker

On a limb was this lyric etched 
By leprechaun in rune & sketch.'
T'was not bawdy;But sober in tone 
From this wistful soul Who lived alone

To good Saint Patrick he made a plea
From the trap of treasure deliver me, 
In crock & jar I have full trove
Yet never am I to leave this grove.'

For the wicked witch left me much in gold
Upon her death, from a maudlin cold
Now I'm being held by the love of greed
And could not be pulled free; by the greatest steed.'

Yet I've read that God has made a plan
That I see regards a woman & man
But Leprechauns are a different breed
That trace descent from the shamrock seed

I'm aware your day is soon to dawn
So I plea your help on the coming morn
I need a loving sylph in green 
To lead me in love, to the modern scene.'

I repent of my former punk rock days
When I followed many a fad & craze
Yet I have this idea you can make a case
With God above who is full of grace

I beseech in hope, I need more faith.'
Yet if its not to be, my will I'll brace
Let me not languish, though; so folorn...
Just an old 'punk-crocker' tired & worn.!
Form: Rhyme

an Aussie had a Barry Crocker-bawdy

***bawdy
--------
once an Aussie had a Barry Crocker
when he got fined from an angry copper
he smoked up his holden ute
then said it was real beaut
because of this, the fine was made double

and his best mate was nicked named blue
cooked kangaroo and emu stew
gave none to hungry Scott
'cause he gulped down the whole lot
then spent the next day in the loo

his best shiela was from Melbourne
wore little since she was well born
she'd walk around in the buff
except for mittens an' gloves
till the day she fell on a thorn

she had a best friend called Mary
who had a whistling canary
it's tune stuck in Mary's head
from morning to night-time bed
and drove her to reach the sherry

they all knew a bogan from sydney
who was very tall and so skinny
one day while at bondi
meet a young blond called di
their first date was spent in his tinnie

di was a bushie and jillaroo
who squawked louder than a cockatoo
she would waddle like a duck
but he couldn't believe his luck
when she showed him her secret tattoo

one day while out for a ride
he asked her to be his bride
and when she said yes
they relieved his stress
till they both became cross-eyed
---------------------------------------------------
Aussie slang interpretations:
Barry Crocker-shocker
copper-policeman
smoked up-skid
holden-popular australian make of car
ute-utility vehicle [a car & pickup truck combined]
beaut-beautiful
loo-toilet
shiela-girl/woman
buff-naked
bogan-uncouth person
tinnie-small aluminium boat
.....................
Jan 26 is Australia Day-to all Aussies, happy Oz day
© Markus Jay  Create an image from this poem.
Form: Limerick

While Skeptic Attempts To Comprehend the Legacy of Jonathan Edwards

Alternately titled: Get out of my head mister chatterbox!

While inside me noggin legions
of monstrous demons abhor
protest being force fed
arcane and obscure
assaying into religious dogma
hence mind chatter goes full bore
thus crafting poem quite a difficult chore,
one lightweight bag of bones
basketcase weave gotta deplore,

nevertheless mine tincup rattled
courtesy garden variety eyesore
athwart slip stream
of space/time continuum
twenty two minus
seven years and fourscore
orbitz around black hole sun
scattering cremains galore
camouflage ashes colored like hoar.

Upon prima facie first blush
me mind's eye all atwitter,
sans long forgotten
"FAKE" sexual exploits
set mum (chrysos anthem) all aglitter,

boot like short order cook I hapt tubby
quickly realized trumpeting collusion,
a near fatal collision course
with Matthew Scott's antimatter
caw zing friggin insomnia

finding ma noggin scrambled
likesome lithesome cockamamie critter
whipped into frenzy
like battered butter
holy grits, alm manned in fight of ma life

cause I haint acquitter
baa (jaw edge), ah woe cup feeling
hedged hog extremely bushed 'n bitter,
this raging red bull inside me mind,
now body wheeling wickety wack,

lichen to moss elf gut seasonal litter
bitta asthma - insides
got balled into wah racket
like quietly rioting unfetter
herd plain tennis (see) hens,

gone south tub bespatter
ear rilly jawboning jabberwocky
reducing gray matter,
and all flesh sundered
into meaty platter

to pulverized, irradiated,
cremated... faux fluffernutter batter
analogous tummy Aunt
Jemima's famous flapjacks,
she fantastically fashioned better

than Betty Crocker
tossing spatulated glommed
gook suitable as bonesetter
high as the Taj Mahal,
while she merrily jabbered,

her native patois singsong blatter
all this inaudible clatter
muffled 10,000 maniacs mad as a hatter
madly clangorous dinner cowbells
aroused bacchanalian sybaritic skitter

ring jitterbugging fantasies
of barenaked ladies doth splutter
as bedraggled, frazzled, grizzled...poetry
like cocky rooster that did stutter!
Form: Rhyme


Get Out of My Head Mister Chatterbox

Get Out Of My Head Mister Chatterbox!

Upon prima facie first blush
me mind's eye all atwitter,
sans long forgotten
"FAKE" sexual exploits
set mum (chrysos anthem) all aglitter,

boot like short order cook I hapt tubby
quickly realized trumpeting collusion,
a near fatal collision course
with Matthew Scott's antimatter
caw zing friggin insomnia

finding ma noggin scrambled
likesome lithesome cockamamie critter
whipped into frenzy
like battered butter
holy grits, alm manned in fight of ma life

cause I haint acquitter
baa (jaw edge), ah woe cup feeling
hedged hog extremely bushed 'n bitter,
this raging red bull inside me mind,
now body wheeling wickety wack,

lichen to moss elf gut seasonal litter
bitta asthma - insides
got balled into wah racket
like quietly rioting unfetter
herd plain tennis (see) hens,

gone south tub bespatter
ear rilly jawboning jabberwocky
reducing gray matter,
and all flesh sundered
into meaty platter

to pulverized, irradiated,
cremated... faux fluffernutter batter
analogous tummy Aunt
Jemima's famous flapjacks,
she fantastically fashioned better

than Betty Crocker
tossing spatulated glommed
gook suitable as bonesetter
high as the Taj Mahal,
while she merrily jabbered,

her native patois singsong blatter
all this inaudible clatter
muffled 10,000 maniacs mad as a hatter
madly clangorous dinner cowbells
aroused bacchanalian sybaritic skitter

ring jitterbugging fantasies
of barenaked ladies doth splutter
as bedraggled, frazzled, grizzled...poetry
like cocky rooster that did stutter!

Premium Member Just Desserts

The chocolate frosting was whipped for the cake
But it flicked on your neck by a simple mistake
Don’t move my love I’ll clean you up
With lips and tongue I’ll gently suck.

Mmmm, that’s good, lets have some more
There are other body parts we can explore
Remove your apron and what’s underneath
Cover up the box, so Betty Crocker can’t peek.

With spatula I’ll cover your passion
Chocolate cupcakes are all the fashion
On the kitchen table I’ll have my dessert
Careful dear, you’re ripping my shirt.

The company came later that night
And looked surprised to see the sight
Of a naked cake with no frosting there
Yet the hint of chocolate smell in the air.
© Joe Flach  Create an image from this poem.
Form: Rhyme

Water

11/11/16
"Water"


On land and in the water

Ores such as copper


The M.V. P. of the entire roster

Back in the day they use to call me Harry Potter

Show me a lady that can cook like Betty Crocker

I'll appreciate every meal especially the peach Cobbler

Showing her respect and honor

And treating her proper


My mind continuing to wander

What opportunity lies over yonder?

Something I could find out or just continue to ponder



No it's not ever cool to be a bank robber

Or suicide bomber


Of every rhyme I post, I am the author

In school was only a mediocre scholar

Objects assembled with screws and washers


Certains days shorter or longer 

Depending on the season the weather getting colder or hotter

Nearby in these waters exists otters

Where people fish in fresh and saltwater

For many things, like trout, crab ,salmon and lobster

Trees grown from seeds, with much more than hard work and a water dropper



No good in remaining to be somber

Got to prosper

By showing and proving what I got to offer


I love playing sports, even soccer

I'm a fan of any well made lager

And I've always had an interest in owning a dog that is a boxer

Fascinations in all species not just nightcrawlers


Never was the biggest talker


Just trying to become wiser and stronger


One day I just may own a chair that is a rocker

By: Dalton Ogletree
Form: Rhyme

1920 To 1929

I am the roaring twenties 
And the cotton club. 
   I am Al Capone and his 
Thugs. 

   I am the rise of Joseph 
Stalin. 
   I am the age of science 
And penicillin. 

   I am Walt Disney and 
Mickey Mouse. 
   I am electricity in 
My house. 

   I am the stock market 
Crash. 
   I am the first Academy 
Award bash. 

   I am Miss America pageant 
The first time. 
   I am Valentino dies reads 
The headlines. 

   I am the great depression 
Sweeps the land. 
   I am Lindbergh on north 
Atlantic flight plan. 

   I am Betty Crocker and 
Wonder bread. 
   I am the great migration 
Watch me spread. 

   I am speakeasies and Gerber 
Baby food. 
I am the age of Jazz puts 
You in the mood. 

   I am the woman's right to 
Vote ,19th amendment. 
   I am seven-up, Coca cola's 
First resentment. 

 
     Turbo1904
Form: Rhyme

Regretting Cake

I'm not much of a desert eater
 but give me egg and I'm quite the beater
blend flour and vanilla, a pineapple or two
 and I'll make an upside down cake for you.
No Betty Crocker, but with a little sugar and butter
 sweet cherries and cake can set your heart  flutter.
Let it lay tempting atop a yellow fluffy cake
 and a slice you would surely take.
Another, yes go right ahead, you're welcome to it
 You love cake and I do too, just let your pants unzip,
Enjoy the sweet juicy fluffy temptation
 later you can hold on to your hesitation
Regret the indigestion and the bulge 
 but it was good now gone, gulp, I know.
© DM Babbit  Create an image from this poem.
Form: Rhyme

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