Funnyspace Poems | Examples


A Newlywed's Lament

Elixers, emulsions, powders and lotions,
spread on the counter like a fleet on  an ocean.
It’s those bathroom battles that I still see,
ground that was lost, or a quiet victory.
A bloodless conflict, I must concede,
But battle lines drawn in a battle indeed.
We circle each other like birds of prey,
thinking of that explosive day
that we both know will come with a great thrill
when like raptors we swoop in for the kill.
For space to be had that doesn’t exist,
ironies aplenty, it’s life with a twist.
Irons and curlers and blow dryers too,
for goodness sake, what’s a man supposed to do?
At every visit I eyeball the hair
that grows by the day, stuck to the “Skin Care.”
Things wadded up  in the waste basket,
oft overflowing like a yawning casket.
A place for dead things, unmentionables too,
then I think of my vows when I said “I love you”.
If a couple survives bathroom things,
chances are good  they’ll keep wearing their rings.
But half of that space should be for the groom,
for heaven's sake, I too need room.

Ode To Alf For Laurie's Sake! = )

Ode to ALF for Laurie's sake
His furry suit awful and fake
Favorite snacks were feline licks
My knee-slap fix in EightySix
His favorite food?  Remember That?
Here's a hint...guard your cat!!


Oh Miss Ginn, Why won't you see?
The best invasion since E.T.
This space muppet show for Trekkie spawn
What if his ship wrecked in your lawn?
You'd coldly turn this ALF away?
  A.K.A Gordon Shumway?
Leave him homeless?  Where's your manners?!
Thank God he wrecked down at the Tanner's

ALF sadly can never ever go back
 To his home in far off Melmack
So here he lives, sippin' space tonic
 Dodging the neighbor, Mrs. Akmanek

Ive not seen this show in twenty some years
But with YouTube the cobwebs diappeared
So here I write ALF a tribute poem
This poor Melmakian without a home


Had to do some homework for this....hope you gotta rise out of it!!
Form: Ode


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