Fangy Poems


Blood Type: O-verwhelmingly Lonely

By moonlit nights, I prowl with grace,
No mirror shows my pale, sharp face.
Stake through heart? Please, not today—
I dodge those stakes and run away.

Garlic bread? You think I'll drool?
I've got a stash behind the stool.
Sunlight's foe? A mild complaint,
Sunscreen 50 is my saint.

I drink your blood, but don't take fright—
It's just a snack to get me right.
No veins harmed, I swear, no mess,
Just need my iron, I confess!

Yet deep inside this fangy guise,
Loneliness behind my eyes.
Immortal curse, eternal night,
A shadow lost without the light.

So laugh at myths of vampire dread,
But think of all the tears I've shed.
I'm just a feature of the night,
Trying to keep my teeth polite.

I tried to date on Tinder once,
But "Undead" marked me as a dunce.
They matched, then screamed, then blocked my chat,
Just 'cause I asked, "May I taste that?"
Categories: fangy, 12th grade, fantasy, funny,
Form: Rhyme

Premium MemberSuch Naughty Trickery

three wicked moons ago, we flew to a halloween get-away 
on the beach island frilled with dangling bouquets.” no
costumes , please”,  the invitation loudly read.. so off i went, 
the brood still washing their heads… in simple sundress, my eyes
kept singing la-la-la. the hall was empty, freaky lights went off. in a flick,

witches were brewing black, fangy cats... a lady gaga
spiking screams, then came a judas hanging on a centipede tree,
by the false door,  tattooed skeletons dancing squeaky reggae.
suffocating in a terrorized room, i hollered,” where’s my family!!”
what a viciously naughty night! they were all dressed in
ghostly ghoul and goblin witchery, tickling my almost bare body
just behind me… oh well, it’s october’s time  to slay the night
and i was the pawn, the surprised victim, crackling with nervous delight


( for paula swanson's halloween of years past)
Categories: fangy, adventure, funnyhalloween, halloween,
Form: Light Verse


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