Colorectal Poems | Examples


Frozen In a Bag

frozen in a bag
i can still move, but i am numb
i question the circulation of my blood
my derriere is raw
my stomach stays gurgling
hello, my dear gastroenterologist
charmed to meet you in this altered state of permanence
in this moment, all i can think about is 'once upon a time'
in this moment, what creeps into my head is 'colorectal cancer'
now i become deathly afraid of my threatened mortality
i wanna run, but then i would constipate myself and i could not live with that
so i reluctantly decide to stay
i pray for the wholesomeness of the thawing.......
.....frozen in a bag.....
Categories: colorectal, hope, how i feel,
Form: Free verse

The Surgeon

We praise the colorectal surgeon,
Misunderstood and much maligned;
Slaving away in the heart of darkness,
Working where the sun don't shine.

Let's call on the rectal surgeon,
It's a calling we could crave;
Lift up your hands and join us,
Let's all do the finger wave.

When it comes to spreading joy,
There many a sweet techniques,
Some spread joy to all the world,
While others just spread cheeks.

Me thinks the cardiologist,
Needs be the patient’s friend;
But the colorectal surgeon,
Knows he'll get you in the end.

Why do you call a rectal surgeon,
It's one of those mysterious things;
Is it because in that profession,
There are always openings?

When I first met a rectal surgeon,
He didn't quite understand;
I said, "It's nice to meet you,
But do you mind if we don't shake hands.

A doctor he did want to be,
For golf he loved to play;
But this is not quite what he meant,
By eighteen holes a day.

We praise the colorectal surgeon,
Misunderstood and much maligned;
Slaving away in the heart of darkness,
Working where the sun don't shine.

Not mine
Categories: colorectal, funny, heart, heart, sun,
Form: Rhyme


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