Rumors abound
All around town
Lily White
Needs a knight
She is tangled
Being wrangled
By the tricky trees
Planted by Peacocks from Leeds
Wolves are down under
Hearing wraths thunder
Drinking Burnley claret wine
Getting ready to do second tier time
In comes the Hammer girl
Wearing expensive pearls
Bought using Gallo credit
Wondering, ‘will anyone get it?’
Message, ‘relegate’
Easier opponents await
Fans will have reason to cheer
Dousing the same expensive beer
As players work on maturing skills
Crunching numbers, paying the bills
Oh yes, who is going to get dropped
Commentating, ‘our season truly was a flop’
Officially closing the show
Taking the athletic production to parts unknown
Goal now ‘will want to come back’
Claiming healed healthy, surviving a relegation attack
Burnley had a conjugal date after getting a vision
Was warned you may want to listen
To the canary finishing his mission
Relocating to a lower level
Feeling a wee bit better not needing a shovel
Getting experience from the higher league
Canary play should increase and be at a winning degree
Venturing to the dungeon
After buying snacks for the munching
Seeing it in sight
Wanting diplomacy not a fight
Pouring some Claret wine
Two sat down for a dine
While each other picked each other’s mind
Everything proceeded in calm fashion
No scoring just a lot of passing
Until plenty of ticks were put on the clock
When wood was a chip off the old block
Spirits were high
A break they did try
Canary pondered “‘A’ rated exposure could be a lie”
Come back more refreshed
Burnley waited watched wanting a drunken confess
Near the conclusion
Canary made a goal that added to the losing
It was the knockout punch
Closing the weekend late late lunch
Parting their ways
Canary had nothing to say
Green and yellow
Quietly mellow
Letting go
Moving on to another show
Pay Citizens one last visit
Their high profile property sold, no longer listed
Arsenal first Friday, always start well
New signings too, will give Leicester hell
Arsenal easy, next,
Liverpool in the early game, a win at a canter
Watford offer up more presents than Santa
Arsenal easy, Liverpool canter, next,
Chelsea at the Bridge a cert to crush Burnley
Untouchable last season, this is money for free
Arsenal easy, Liverpool canter, Chelsea a cert, next,
Man City away win, there’s simply no reason
Why Brighton won’t be relegation fodder this season
Arsenal easy, Liverpool canter, Chelsea a cert, Man City away, next,
Spurs to cane Newcastle, big gap in class
Don’t think the magpies are gonna last
Arsenal easy, Liverpool canter, Chelsea a cert, Man City away, Spurs pure class, last,
Man United on fire, all glitz and glamour
Scoring for fun, gonna stuff the hammers
Arsenal easy, Liverpool canter, Chelsea a cert, Man City away, Spurs pure class, United on fire,
Fifty quid on a six-fold, what could possibly go wrong
.
.
Arsenal Nil Leicester 1
.
.
Damn
Hand Grown In Thyme.
On Brummie Sea and Burnley oak,
In bearded wood and clove
I hidey in this Mutton cloth
That strangles like a choke.
Lampooned upon this Ferris wheel,
A chuckle for a hoot.
I swung with empty boxing glove
And knocked a joke aboot.
I thank you from my Uncles chin
And dear old Auntie Pat
Who did asunder to a sin
And dogged her pussycat!
They trundled stubborn as a toe
And caring not a care
Sent humphing parties to and fro
Though knew not who they were.
‘Bejees!’ I crippled all a goat
What finery I’ve found,
Four friends in foursome charging free-
A bargain at a pound.
‘Well fancy that,’ a woman sat,
And bending like a river
Weaved not a spell but nasty smell
And sent me all a quiver.
‘How come you like to gape alewd?’
I asked but half an inch.
To which the Lady took a fence
And hit me with a pinch.
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