Best Sods Poems
Three pounds a month they
ask, save the Tiger, save the
Panda, save the Jaguar, save
the rain forest.
Three pounds a month for
the children's hospital and
for the save the children's
fund, the RSPCA, RSPB,
Cancer research, just, only
three pounds a month, now
my pockets are empty with
all these donations.
Our governments, they also
donate, mainly to the
FAT CAT SOCIETY
yes those poor sods who
caused the majority of man's
suffering with their greed and
avarice.
Please just three pound a
month for the Daniel
Cheesemans poetry fund.
Categories:
sods, angst
Form:
Prose Poetry
Shish, don’t wake the dead!
The sculpted angel holds
Her finger to her lips and
Whispers..............
Lichens on her limbs attest
To the time she has spent
Tender breathing silence.
About the gravestone
Graver still, little trinkets
Rest; gifts that stay
Tranquil .
The silent scene is set
But in my mind I hear
The sods of earth upturned
By the diggers spade.
I hear the sculptors
Chisel chip marble
Away to reveal the
Angel’s skin .
I hear taught ropes
Slide beneath the casket and
I hear the sobs of loved
Ones in the breeze.
.........................Shish!
Categories:
sods, death
Form:
Free verse
Broken dreams, and smiles and flowers
Grow apace throughout our fervid hours
The times of wreaths and solemn nods
The dearth; some worth and serried sods.
The gathered few or many more
The muted laughs, cross creaking floors
The everyday, it pervades; this all
It’s a gamut run; Christmas to fall
We often can’t; yet sometimes will
Observe our promise to hold our wills!
Forgive our sins we fall so short
Send angels Lord for we are bought.
With blood and Love, not fully of this earth
The sun moon, stars do bow, their worth.
©Joe Maverick 13-11-2022
Categories:
sods, christian,
Form:
Rhyme
God of atoms
break my purpose,
my workable clay.
Feed me
clumps of sorrow,
sods of joy
one particle at a time.
Seed me not too much
of your breakable sadness,
plow me much
with your passions.
Allow me, if it please you,
to dwell in this intricate husk
until the sky
make a nest in its marrow.
Let the dirt
of my fingernails
guide me inward
into your blooms.
And when I am ready
for the reaping
scatter my worms.
Categories:
sods, poetry,
Form:
Free verse
Cancer it breaks cancer it takes
It erodes and corrodes body and soul
Lingers and takes hold cant be stopped or controlled
Terminal is with an apparent ending
Loss of hope and no point in pretending
Life span is against natures clock
Head now on the proverbial block
Spreads with ease the cardinal disease
Painful fulfilment never set to ease
Deterioration quickens as the body weakens
The illness striving towards winning Beacons
Inhabiting this life just day to day living
Illness taking everything with it unforgiving
Maintain dignity the only plea of life left
Cancers taken everything will be till death
Being the shadow of ones former self
A serious turn for the worst inevitable ill health
Oh its just sods law to over through a bad habit
Of smoking only to contract lung cancer damn it
Undetected unnoticed overseen by mere testing
Cancer accumulating cells rapidly and festering
Agonising pain fills ones veins no relief no escape
The moment of death ones lonely never-ending wait
In the last moments the death rattle echo's consumes last breath
The only hope remaining is there's life after death.
Categories:
sods, cancer,
Form:
Rhyme
"The Paradox"
When we had crossed Styx
like a slow game of knuckles
we were thrown for a six
it was like the party
had kick started
way ahead of time
without us
escape from the world
of fools is never easy
there, the breeze
of freewill ceases
so we sat and let
the oarsman paddle us
a cross
to where
we did not know
it was never Home
way ahead of us
the sound of distant
merriment like
fading church bells,
ding dong Avon
calling, some kind
of fayre ball,
perhaps Avalon,
to us it was like
taking a sip of - well,
no sugar coating for this,
a bitter haunted tincture
laced with false promise,
dangling nebulous Utopia
somewhere behind us
the noose called thought
stood in a numbered cell
pacing back and forth,
sometimes the occupier
would play dead,
lie still, back to the wall
then turning,
engrave another mark
into the wall, counting time,
watching it fall
dust to dust
ash to ash
with the other sods;
the paradox?
One wants it to end,
then one does not;
the grand mal heart
seizing in to mind
the bittersweet
contradiction?
to have and
to have not
(LadyLabyrinth / 2023)
“Avalon will always be there
for all men to find
if they can seek the way thither,
throughout all the ages past the ages.
If they cannot find the way to Avalon,
it is a sign, perhaps,
that they are not ready."
Categories:
sods, journey, muse, mystery,
Form:
Narrative
Black magic, White magic it’s all the same,
it’s all devil worship, it’s just in the name.
These people all think that they’re clever sods too,
by casting their spells there is nought they can’t do.
Black magic, White magic it’s all the same,
all witches and wizards are just plain insane.
They know it’s not real, they’re on a power trip.
do they really imagine that we are all thick.
Black magic, White magic it’s all the same,
they all believe that there’s more to life’s game
than what you can see or the things you have heard,
any sane person knows this is absurd.
Black magic, White magic it’s all the same,
the trouble and misery that’s caused by this game.
The spells that they cast are just wrecking my life
for they get all the good things and leave nothing but strife.
Black magic, White magic it’s all the same,
I’ll stick to religion it’s more like my game.
I’ll pray for some money for me and my wife,
I don’t need magic to help me through life.
Black magic, white magic it’s all the same,
maybe religion is part of this game?
If that is the case I must think this one through,
now where did I leave that good book on Voodoo.
Ivor G Davies
Categories:
sods, magic, religion,
Form:
Rhyme
I wrote in honor of my friend and
lovely lady Mystic Rose
"Thanks for the inspiration"
STEAMED CLEANED by JTCurtis
Mike, Finn and McGee
Thought a day in the sauna would be
like heavenly bliss
To hear that steam hiss
And detoxing oneself, it's the key
Soon, there sat all three boys
Then up popped a sudden wee noise
Mike said "Dat'd me phone"
"Yea, bot I know dat ringtone"
Finn said while knocked off his poise
Then came a very loud sound
with such force, it knocked McGee down
Finn said "You old sods,
Dats just me I Pod"
Said Mike " Yea, I've heard dem around"
Then suddenly there came a loud boom
"It's your tablet McGee we assume"
"You boys now relax
It's just me old fax"
And that's when the boys cleared the room
Categories:
sods, humorous,
Form:
Rhyme
There is an age that parents fear,
A time when manners disappear.
When siblings turn and just for fun,
Hate everything, the time’s begun.
Now all become pure selfish sods
And think they walk where no one’s trod.
They now behave like things from hell,
Just why this happens, none can tell.
Their mum and dad they disrespect,
They seem to join a different sect.
One that exists for them alone,
They all become a ‘Kevin’ clone.
There is no way, that them we’ll please,
It’s worse than any dire disease.
We pray their moods will go away,
And dread the horrors of each day.
Their adolescent age we blame,
And know that once we were the same.
But all we did was curse and swear,
Nowadays they think, they walk on air.
They think adults don’t understand,
And they’re the first to walk this land.
Parents never had their needs,
Or ever lived in times like these.
Sometimes our teens can be so vile,
They moan and argue all the while.
Their insults make us feel quite prone,
To bless the day when they’ll leave home.
The only thing that we can do,
Is bear the brunt and see it through.
These kids who now have no control,
Will wake one day and find their soul.
It’s now they drive us all insane,
But surely where there’s pain, there’s gain.
One day they’ll take a bloody fall,
And find they didn’t know it all!
Ivor G Davies
Categories:
sods, teenage,
Form:
Rhyme
Just a few lines I hereby write to let you know
that I, in my entirety am still alive,
care I give, when with pen perceiving you so slow
the words upon these lines, just in time will arrive.
You will not know the house, when you come on back home
twelve month ago the rent we defaulted, so we moved,
which was good for your mother, she’s too old to roam,
while it seems her affair with the rent man, unproved.
I’ve managed to get myself a really good job
having many hundreds of poor sods beneath me,
as greenkeeper, the graveyard grass I cut and swab,
that is when this terrible pain stops in my knee.
Your sister Edna has had a baby this week
not yet found out if baby boy or baby girl,
so don’t know if it’s got a tap to take a leak
or a hands free strikingly attractive pearl.
We both went to the doctor the other day
it’s your mother she is not keeping all that well,
the doctor placed a small tube down her passage way
said “Don’t talk”, I offered to buy, but wouldn’t sell.
Your uncle Raymond drowned last week in a large vat
this full of single malt whisky at the brewery,
workmates tried to save him, but he fought them off, drat,
cremated, fire took days to douse, come floury.
The weather is o.k.; it has rained twice this week
first off for three days, then the other for four days,
then undertaker rang, sounded very bleak
said, “Payment for grandma’s grave, or does not here stays”.
Oh! by the way I was to send you some money
but I forgot to place it in the envelope,
sealed it with kiss, thought you may think that’s funny
till you hear mum gave you to the charity “SCOPE”.
© Harry J Horsman 2012
the idea is not mine originally, it is
An adaptation of an Irish letter.
Categories:
sods, fantasy, funny, baby, baby,
Form:
Rhyme
Today we remember the fallen
on foreign fields that were trodden
by armies at odds.
Our wreaths laid on sods
will ensure they are never forgotten.
Categories:
sods, military, remembrance day, world
Form:
Limerick
Let me tell you about the notorious two
Well known by both me and you
Terrorising the neighborhood
They ventured in to the wood
Causing mischief, getting up to no good
Poor old Anne May
Was baking cakes and cookies one day
Left them to cool by the window on display
Not knowing that the two were stalking their prey
The little sods ate the hot cookies off the baking tray
Then threatened poor granny May to make some more
When she refused they tried to squeeze her in between the oven doors
Lucky a computer hacker running from the police heard her distressful implore
He witnessed the duo trying to cut her up with a saw
They chased after him and caught him in flight
Boy you should have seen he put up a good fight
The police caught them and the duo acted like two little children that had fright
“It’s not like that,” he said, “Go see the old woman, what a sight.”
The police went to Anne May’s house
She was lying all wounded in a bloody blouse
Still squealing like a little mouse
She shook and would say anything until she saw her spouse
The notorious two were eventually taken to jail
The computer hacker now works for the FBI on bail
And if you want to know what happened to poor old May, the story is out on email.
For those who are blind there is computer screen braille
Categories:
sods, funnyold, computer, me, old,
Form:
Burlesque
Snickering sods with feet of clay,
Who can we friggen rob today,
Knock down the cleaners wage some more,
Contracted 200 less a week 4 sure,
And yes it is a fact,
The tory bustards hate the poor!
Ironic is the icy grip,
As death creeps closer on a bit,
Give money out, a bribe do it,
Salvation bought haw haw,
Think again fat hog, whaffor?
Don Johnson
{Australia where the government cleaners were forced to take a FORCED ON CONTRACT wage drop of $200 a week}
the incessant need for greed,
till you get old and frightened of your future prospects,
the oh so noble :} philantrophist.......
RETURNING THE ROBBERY PROCEEDS OF 70 YEARS ETC...
Categories:
sods, adventure,
Form:
Ballad
Given as a gift from Germany to Kabul zoo in Afghanistan
No fields to run in - just a miserable enclosed barren land
You were blessed with a beautiful lioness partner, Chucha
She must have made you feel no less than a majestic Shah
You survived against all the invasions, and the bloody wars
Behind those dark miserably cramped closed barring doors
You were a survivor, that against all the cruelly made odds
Was even threaten to be killed, by the unholy Taliban sods
But your loyal keeper fought for your life, using the Quran
With the prophet Muhammad to aid you to all understand
That an animal is to be respected, he also had his own pets
To kill Marjan, would in the end, will leave you with regrets
But you were brought down by an egotistical Mujahedeen
Who you killed for mauling your Chucha for fun it seemed
In turn the killed brother gave you three grenades as a gift
The damage it caused you was more than deserved - swift
You lost your sight in one eye and near all of it in the other
Because of a under deserving revenge of a grieved brother
You lost all of your teeth, with the blast all of your hearing
Yet you survived, to Afghans, you became more endearing
That they took it upon themselves to then kill this very man
For the ignorance of the situation as he did not understand
You had thought this man was a threat to your lioness pride
As it was in the end his own fault he was attacked then died
As the wars in Afghanistan raged so did the famine drought
When it came to food for you there was too little of it about
But the Afghan people gathered in force to see you were fed
No one wanted the Shah Marjan from hunger be found dead
You came through all of this, skin sagging on a frame so lean
But for it all, never did once made you ferocious or be mean
Your beloved keeper walked with you within your enclosure
Despite your injuries you always maintained your composure
Your name travelled the world, and they wished you the best
But after a quarter of a century you then laid yourself to rest
This tribute is to you mera jaan Marjan – the pearl of Afghanistan
May you always with Chucha, fly free, high above this desert land
Higher and higher with the longed for eternal peace may you soar
As the winds carry along with it your once mighty and proudly roar
Categories:
sods, absence, beautiful, betrayal, death
Form:
Couplet
Mum another word for mother
One We want as no other
Solid and strong
Geeing us along
In times of of need
Your always there
To hold our hand
And show you care
Mum your there when we are down
Listening to us and giving us the frown
Giving us the strength we need
To get up and proceed
This is done without a fuss
Because you’re the wise one that we trust
As a mum for all these years
We so sorry for many tears
But we try in our own little way
Making you proud at the end of the day
You taught us how to cook and clean
Sort out our lives and be seen
Without you there to sort us out
All we would do is scream and shout
The bank of mum is a full time job
I know its hard as were little sods
But we do love you with all our hearts
Without you we would not start
So thank you\ mum for being you
And this comes from the other two
You made us what we are today
Strong and caring all the way
And finally I would like to say
We love you mum
Happy Mothers Day
Categories:
sods, family, mother, mother son,
Form:
Sonnet