Best Nappies Poems

Yesterday my day was bad,  in fact it was really crappy
Found seagull poop on my car- why can’t they wear a nappy

I also have an issue with a local dog
Went out for a walk and stepped on a dog’ log’

I suppose I should be...

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3 holes Hut on Cubbie

Yep me an Sow the wild pig were,
Under the low set hut, yessir,
I was 12 months old, I be,
Nappies were short, so I had none see,
The piglet kept me clean,
Did he…

The old hut is now a fallen down,
Where piggy an I...

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Sticky, grubby fingers,
Chocolate covered faces,
Dirty prints on wallpaper,
Put parents through their paces.
From smelly, messy nappies,
To angelic little smiles,
These are some of the wonders,
Of our parental trials.
There's tears and tantrums,
Fun and giggles too,
Even on the tough days,
When we get covered in poo.
Parenting isn't a hardship,
It's a...

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MEMORIES OF MOTHERHOOD

Childbirth isn’t called labour for nothing, it is damned hard work but so worthwhile when the baby is finally placed in your arms. I can still recall the sound of my newborn son crying and taking his very first breath, it was a...

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I am playing with my dollies
And my princess pram all pink
I'm nearly 5
A big girl now
No more nappies
Or plastic pants
I think

I outgrew the potty
When I was only three
My mum says it's because I am brave
Now I go to the toilet all by myself
But today my...

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Courting days are long over now 
men, well, what does define a man?
Certainly, it is not merely physical?
yet one would expect manliness to 
involve some sort of strength?

Does a man let a woman cry?
Does a man make a woman cry?
Honey DO this! Honey move-do that!

The...

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Flesh on show and sun tan lotion
bodies laid on towels or sun lounges 
By the ocean
Salty air wind blown hair
Music streaming from the near by fair
Baby screaming nappies full
Cool guys looking for babes on the pull
Sun shades and floppy hats
Grown men playing cricket with ball...

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The morning sun hovers coyly
behind broad shoulders of the John Crow Mountain
before unwrapping petals of fever plant and Venice.
Mama’s countenance was far contrast to one so radiant, 
so when the old Leyland bus went shuddering along  gravel road
the first beams break through pinewood forest.

The...

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Why do people talk to babies as though they were stupid?

Isn’t he lovely? the old woman said
And doesn’t he look the spit of his Dad
Is he on solids, how long does he sleep
And how many other kids have you had?
Who does he look like? the...

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Kindheartedness

Ellen had a lot of experience in washing nappies, six bairns in less than eight years. William 
Chapman had a lot to answer for. Everyone knew, or thought they knew, what poor Ellen had 
to put up with. His drinking, his womanizing, and, some said,...

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Would Joan of Arc be a post office clerk
In the year of two thousand and four?
And Lady Godiver, if we could revive her
Would she mop the kitchen floor?
These heros of history, make my lifestyle a mystery
Such women we shouldn’t ignore

So well in my thirties, with...

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Unexpectedly 
She became a part of us
A one year old

After many years,  
Pitter patter sounds was heard
And nappies changed 
She is a young lady now
Started working already

Our little princess
My sister’s gift from above
a blessing to us.




        ...

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A loving father  wishes the very best for his little princess..
Be it in school or home, within and without, she gets the best...

From day one, he is overcame with pride the day his princess arrived..
His fatherly instincts are kicked into overdrive as he swelled...

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My Mother
Mary Ann Dow Gardiner

Mary Ann Dow Stuart wis her maiden name,
Noo, she wisnae a Scoatish Lass o' fame.
Born in nineteen hunner an' five on the fifth o' May.
gorgeous she wis' at oany time o' the day.

Like aw Mums, she wis a'ways there,
nae ither Mum...

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It's hard to beat the old age inventions
When our bodies refuse to meet our intentions,
Those top shelf items you simply can't reach,
The ones at the bottom inaccessibly deep!

I can't squeeze the new leveraged grabber
And the kids have confiscated my ladder,
So I hook around with my...

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