Cheap Date Poem
About my name.
If only I could have had more input!
But you were so busy reading
"What to Expect" that you
Weren't expecting how much everyone would hate my name!
Rhymes, people, rhymes! Why do you think I was kicking so hard?
About a name.
Shakespeare said a rose by any other name would smell as sweet.
Hmm. You could hand me the most beautiful bouquet of roses,
But if you said, "I got these Fart Flowers just for you," I'd be spelling my name for the judge issuing the restraining order.
Changing my name.
Please don't make any suggestions;
We all know how well your first choice went. My closest friends have all put in their two cents:
Chatty, Fatty, Sweet Cheeks, Banana Beak, Mommy, Daddy (no more martinis for my husband) and others not fit to print.
My chosen name.
So many choices: Nobody doesn't like Sara Lee! Or the person formerly known by a loser name!
No. I picked a winner. Sexy. Addictive. Welcome at any party!
Smoking hot, never a cheap date and so good you'll want more in a few hours! HI! I'm Mary Jane!
January 16, 2017
Copyright © Cindi Rockwell | Year Posted 2017
Cheap Date Poem
Once transformed into an angel of light
Having long viscous fangs that bite
Gone our the lost days of getting respect now in a daze
Perhaps this is the politically incorrect faze?
Zero tollerance for misinterpretation of the text,
Others create a barrage of jokes & get respect
Having abortion on demand means nothing to these big City Thugs!
Or is it just best as I plainly reflect & sweep that notion in thought under the rug?
It used to mean something to have integrity, respect & authenticity?
Still clearer heads have prevailed while some have found there's lying in a sewer...
A transformed angel that appears light yet is the one of death
I must strictly confess,
A tulip dies beneath the sod in time
Do you all remember when you were broke down to your last thin dime?
We plant seeds of regret & then call this charm!
Sound the alarm!
Gone our the days since 1988,
A cheap date a long from that of Watergate.
What a flake I mean Nixon & his lies!
Does this notion in thought come at any big enough surprise?
We have adopted the fake mentality
A notion of disrespect in brutal reality
The onslaught of death & shut gun blasts in the streets!
You want to say something yet you can't
We have cowards for politicians & innocent regret
We erect billboards with false hidden ads
We attend war zones the most children call schools,
Still this is your society & you get to do what you want
A fight to even cope
When you have that fight with the battled old spiced soap on the rope!
Gone our the days today we just froloc in a haze
Our celebrities our fake & so is our dates
Amazonian, fake women that look like men
It's best to go down to Florida & their work on your tans!
Yet we all planted our seeds in this sod of death
A hero's text reads sorry that we met
Gone our the idols we used to hold dear
Today I sheltered a tear like the indian crying in the rain
In deep pain not shelter lies dormant in anguish against
It's deepest hardened sinners quest
Perhaps were just in some violation being put through an ultimate test?
Now I'm better your so very sorry that we ever met ?
Where as others can say whatever they feel
Perhaps I'll just have to play my one last game of Let's Make A Deal ?
Copyright © Mario Vitale | Year Posted 2012
Cheap Date Poem
My date said, “I always order water on my dates.”
“Then I can save a couple of bucks, which is great.”
Alarm bells started to go off in my mind.
This match.com guy was either broke or cheap, and not a find.
If he cannot afford to order me a sweet iced tea,
Then to be honest, I was ready to flee.
Maybe he was too forthright for his own good,
But it let me know how he financially stood.
He confirmed my suspicion when at the end of the dinner,
He split the tab to the penny, proving he was no winner.
He seemed so nice when he asked me for the date.
This one I will throw back, he’s too much of a cheapskate.
Copyright © Brenda McGrath | Year Posted 2017