Best Anteater Poems
THE BULL
His regular emissions
Worthy of politicians
THE ANT
To the anteater
Nothing is sweeter
THE SLOTH
Feel his chagrin
Labelled deadly sin
THE TURKEY
With justified reason
Deplores festive season
THE EEL
Mobile on belly
Recumbent in jelly
THE CAMEL
Far from pretty
Designed by committee
THE HIPPO
A chubby figure
Mouth even bigger
THE RHINO
His muzzle excrescence
Prescribed for tumescence
22 October 2018
Six Word Couplet Series Encore Poetry Contest
Sponsor: Mark Toney
God asked Noah to build an ark
he was happy to oblige
but he wasn't so keen
when he found out
what had to go inside
Two of every animal
then you must set sail
the animals were fearful
the whale began to wail
Even the Gnu knew
this idea would surely falter
but every beast preferred this idea
than being led by nose to slaughter
Noah followed the order
from gnat to lion to horse
this was a recipe for Pandamonium
but Noah knew this of course
Seating plans were issued
but an almighty row took place
The lion the king of the jungle
argued that he was a special case
The Queen Bee wanted second billing
while the Emperor penguin demanded a throne
while the homing pigeon panicked
at not being able to find his way home
Nightime was the worst
sleep was beyond them all
with the woodpecker continually pecking
and the gloworm lighting up the hall
The doves tried to keep the peace
as all hell broke loose
while bets were taken on who had the longest face
the horse, anteater or moose
The pandas tried to be romantic
sleep deprivation made their eyes go black
the magpies kept stealing the others duvets
and the squirrels were nuts to turn back
The elephants said they'd never forget
and they wished they packed more in their trunk
while the terrible smell that stunk out the place
was eventually blamed on the skunk
The bears awoke with sore heads
they had drunk all their supplies in one night
while the hyenas found it hilarious
at their next door neighbours plight
The crows shouted blue murder
but the bats were blind to it all
the ravens were ignored by the masses
as all they said was 'never more'
The maggots agreed it was just rotten luck
to be stuck in this mobile zoo
and every time the peacock showed his feathers
it made the pigeones coo
The badgers were set in their ways
the sheep said their wool was a curse
while the spiders got a verbal warning
for using a sows ear to weave up a purse
Finally they found dry land
the hare raced out in the lead
while the tortoise said there was more to life
than doing everything at top speed
Noah was happy that the journey had ended
and this was the end of the road
but at least one species had enjoyed the trip
the rabbit population had increased ten fold!
The Aardvark and the Pangolin,
Romantically, had been entwined.
But infidelity, was in the air,
Aardvark, had a new suiter in mind.
Pangolin, did challenge his rival,
The Anteater with beautiful snout.
Don’t fear for me, on your betrayal,
Sweet Armadillo, is taking me out.
relentless marching
with no real destination
the anteater wakes
I'm so sad and mad, said Clementine the porcupine
Everyone is afraid of me, one glance and they pee
Do they think I shoot my quills, just for thrills
I can't help the way I am
Me, too, said Antoinette the anteater
I look scary, be wary, others say, but I'm not
My long muzzle is no puzzle, this is me
I can't help the way I am
Me too, said Roth the sloth
Everyone says I'm lazy but I'm not
Hanging in trees, looking at birds and bees
I can't help the way I am
Me too, said Jake the snake
We come in all shapes and sizes, but no one realizes
This is me, I'm special and free
I can't help the way I am
Well, said Barnaby the baboon
I'm not little and cute like a raccoon
And I wouldn't want to be, I'm ME
I look big and imposing, but really just posing
Because I'm unique, shiny and sleek
People feel this way too, just like you
All shapes and sizes and colors
Some screech or holler
But Barnaby is right, just be YOU
GUYS WHO WORK IN THE ZOO
Laryngitis specialist for the giraffe
A dozen lozenges for her calf
Dental assistant doing fillings
Or bridgework for baby crocodillings
Pest control officer for monkeys
But I don’t gotta eat them fleas
Cook doing anteater lunch each day
“Always ants again !” they say
Dry cleaning the striped pyjamas
For horses to masquerade as zebras
Satisfying the needs of the doe
For the big bucks….oh yes oh!
Nose-job surgeon for rhinos fair?
A Depardieu or a Jackson, sir?
A tail-tip trimmer as a try-on?
Especially for the male lion
But not a slimmer trainer for a hippo
A hopeless task becoming a beau
It lays helpless at the foot of the hill gasping for breath, while the shadows drifts slowly over the hardened earth and thickened skies. The scent of the gully birds kept meandering around strange daffodils with courageous scent filtering in the promiscuous skies.
I have learnt that starfish and clams are not the smartest creatures but when they bond together there is no breathing space for the clam to waiver. The bowerbird with its sugary nest scampers around the logs, watching the chipmunk tunneling through the hole while the squirrel kept swinging from door to door and the queen bee kept spewing honey on the wooden floor.
A loud noise echoed from across the horizon crashing through lofty mountain sending billows of smoke through the dented skies. The ashes travels for miles sand and dust mixed with the earth’s crust dancing to the alligator rhythm and the cicada kept its tune for the mass schedule at noon. The beaver stands next to the door watching the giant anteater walking on the shore, while the sea gulls kept asking for more.
I stood from a long distance watching the piranha drifting towards the shore and the gold fish swimming behind its tail with a blood spot on its veil, as the shadows of human encountered with the drill the piranhas plunges in the ocean plate and the mammoth come flying out of nowhere busting down the gate and the fish swam freely towards the shore and migrate into fresh clean waters.
It was a scene that I could never forget; it kept me static on the deck as the ships starts rolling in the voices began to sing and everyone caught on to that mystifying rhythm. I am Free.
Paula the pangolin polished her scaly skin
Went to the market and traded her mandolin
Told the shopkeeper, “I’ll swap for a mandarin,
Oranges are a bit big for a pangolin.”
The shopkeeper gave her the requisite fruit
And said, “Would you sell me your anteater suit?”
Paula said, “It’s not a suit and I’m ravenous,
Ive got a space in my tummy that’s cavernous.”
The shopkeeper said, “But it’s fruit that you’ve got,
Unless you’re a vegan you eat bugs… a lot!”
Paula said, “You’ve just used citrus as cash,
So don’t you judge me as I do something rash.”
She headed outside and said grace to her God
And stamped on the mandarin, til it was trod
The shopkeeper rushed out in anger fuelled haste,
And shouted, “You could have at least had a taste.
“Just look at the juice as it trickles away,
I now wish that I hadn’t served you today.”
“You’re wasting good food,” was the worst of his rants
Til Paula the pangolin said, “Oh look… ants!”
An Amazon Adventure
A Narrative Poem by C Russell
Let’s go, let’s go to the Amazon far,
We’ll catch a boat, won’t need a car!
Let’s see, let’s see the wildlife here,
Jaguar, anteater and white tailed deer.
Let’s travel, let’s travel along the river, too
Down the rapids in our wooden canoe.
Let’s find, let’s find some curious fish,
To see a piranha that is my wish.
Let’s climb, let’s climb the tallest tree,
Then go for a swim with a manatee.
Let’s fly, let’s fly with parrots so high!
Above the leaves all the way to the sky.
Let’s rest, let’s rest under some shady tree,
And watch the White cheeked spider monkey.
Let’s sleep, let’s sleep high up in the canopy,
Next to a giant sloth and his family.
Let’s dream, let’s dream of the flowers so bright,
While a million stars twinkle at night.
The sun sets softly towards the west
The clouds form a shape like dragon with a crest
The birds get ready to go each to his or her nest
In the blueness of the sky the soaking effect of orange light of the sun is expressed
Under shadow of tall buildings unusual red gooseberry by sun’s rays are caressed
Not only are they tasty if you will one ingest
They are also good for making zest
They have hairs on their fruit but those are also easy to digest
Behind the buildings on a playground a slide points towards the west
When a child I slid there not much trill but as a lookout it is the best
By innocence of youth this place is blessed
It is small but by the view from the top of the slide one might be impressed
Forests there form an anteater shape if one looks from east to southwest
The hills roll endlessly as if to boundless nature of horizon to attest
The expanse like an oceanic abyss only much larger then infinity would suggest
Look toward the horizon to the west if seeing king of kings’ sign is your quest
It is towards the horizon but it’s not expanse that is blessed
For even though great it is not deepest or best
For the seal of justice is because it must be and conscious of its own existence and zest
And it is the presence of this justice that I request
Sir! You Have Besmirched the Good Name Of My Pangolin
Nothing can be the same now -
before the recent pandemic
my companion Pangolin
Boris and I,
were carefree,
and happily plying our trade
as chimney sweeps in Siberia,
but since the ‘great lie’
we dare not show our faces
in any town or city,
for they have labeled Boris; a good, kind,
not too gentle creature
as a SPREADER'!
O the calumny. the infamy the inaccuracy!
Now our only recourse
is to have him dress up as an Anteater
and move to Bolivia.
Spiky hair,
brittle waves,
porcupine,
hedgehog,
spiny Anteater,
echidna.
A kid
growing up
prickly.
The long tongues
of children
gibe him sharp.
Tumbleweed in the schoolyard.
Can’t tread him down.
Hurts are on the surface
like frozen
alphabet spaghetti.
Thorns and barbs,
jagged Jeers,
quills quietly quivering
the quarry -
face tucked
into his heart.
Anteater’s ideas are absolute.
Buff-cheeked gibbon gives them a toot.
Tree kangaroo throws down a shoot.
Peacock pheasant gives them the boot.
I run away with all of their loot.
I am kind of a robber galoot.
The anteater
gets to
stick out
its tongue...
What fun!
A trail of sugar…
happy ants crawling along:
Anteater waiting…