Your Secret I'll Never Tell
Rest your weary head my love and let sleep consume your soul, I promise that your secret I’ll never tell, I’ll let your heart and life remain whole
It has been fifteen years since the last time I saw your face, and after all this time would you believe I still feel the same
It’s true, the feelings are just as strong as they used to be, and it’s alright, go ahead and think to yourself that sounds so crazy
How could I still be holding a candle for someone that I haven’t seen or spoken to in years? True love works that way, you see the truth through all the tears
You loved this person and you gave them a part of you that you can never get back, and although they may only think of you as a memory, they’re what helps keep your heart intact
You survive off the memories, the love that you once shared, and eventually you make yourself move on and you put yourself out there
You never forget this person, they’ll always be a part of you, but you must go on with your life and try to be happy because you deserve that too
You should be able to feel again, to be able to see through the despair, you should be able to walk around with your held high and show someone how much that you care
Just because this person killed you emotionally and ripped apart your dreams, you must do what is best for you, by any means
You may always love them although they may never know, but you must bury those feelings deep in the darkness of your heart and never let them show
Give your love to someone else and show them the person that just wasn’t enough for the last, and try to love with all that you are and not forever live in the past
Wishing and hoping and praying for that love to again enter your life, will cause you nothing but eternal misery and so much unwanted pain and strife
It hurts that to this day your name still resounds in my head, and it kills me to know that you never returned after all the things that you once said
But my love please understand that this isn’t fair to me, I tried for years to wait for you just praying that you would one day see
That I was the one, the only one that ever mattered to you, that I was the one as you once told me could make your every dream come true
I was the one that brought you back to life and helped you find your way, I was the one that healed you when you were broken and stood beside you until that last day
You made your choice and I understood then and I gracefully bowed out, because I knew that you were doing what was best for you then and I truly get it now
Now that I have moved on with my life and I have a family of my own, I get why you couldn’t let them go, I feel it in the depths of my soul
No matter how much you love someone and no matter how much you wish that things could be, your children come first, and they should, I get it now I see
I understood then but not to the extent that I do now, there isn’t anything in this world I wouldn’t do for them, that is why I gave you an out
Maybe if things would have been different, maybe in another time, we could have lived out our lives together, but the reality is you have yours and I have mine
Love isn’t always black and white it is many shades of gray, the reality of obligations and so many obstacles in your way
Love isn’t easy, and love can be so unkind, but oh the memories that we made back then will forever be mine
I felt true love, I felt wanted like I never had before, I felt so many emotions that most people will never feel, that I can’t have anymore
But as I look back, I know that you saw the real me as I saw the real you, there was more to our story then just touches and looks, there was love like I never knew
I saw inside of you into the depths of your heart and soul, I delved into your broken, tortured mind and I helped make you whole
Maybe that was my purpose, to show you that you weren’t as broken and unlovable as you once believed, that there is a person out here who sees the real you, every broken, beautiful piece
That there is someone out here that took you as you were and wanted nothing in return, just to be in your presence, to know you, and inevitably to learn
That somewhere out there lies the other half of your soul, the half that makes your heart beat, the half that doesn’t have to use words, because the love you feel is enough and it’s what speaks
So, my love I hope that you’re happy, I pray that you have the life that you dreamed of so long ago, I hope that your days are filled with nothing but happiness that invades your soul
I hope that you never have to wonder if you’re enough, if you’re loved at all, because believe me when I say this to you, “You were my all”
So, thank you for the memories, thank you for the love that you gave, thank you for showing me the real you, and thank you for fulfilling my days
Thank you for healing me and for the way that you made me feel, thank you for showing me true love and for showing me that it is real
Thank you for your beautiful words and releasing me like a butterfly, thank you for showing me that life moves on, but that true love never dies
Thank you for your secrets that you once shared with me, the words that you once told me so long ago that I will never repeat
So yes, I will always love you and maybe we’ll meet in another time, but until that time comes around just know that you still enter my mind
Just know that I will never hurt you or bring your happiness that you have found to an end, you can rest easy for the rest of your life because my love goes with you until we meet again.
Copyright © Amanda Kinzer | Year Posted 2020
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