Amanda Kinzer | + Follow Poet |
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You Didn't Survive Me

(His Version of I Survived You)

You say that you survived the storm that was me but did you after all? Once I came and went wreaking havoc on your life making you feel so small
Those eyes that I so loved all that remains now is pain, and when you look upon your face in the mirror it’s hard to see the beauty underneath the tearstains
You say that you see a watered downed version of the girl that you used to be, but my love I am the one wearing the shame here I only wish that you could see
You claim you were never perfect but in my eyes you were everything, and I know that she is still inside of you crying out for me

Yes, you made mistakes during our time together but so did I, yours was falling in love with me in the first place because I was never meant to be that guy
I opened your eyes, I showed you the world I wanted to create for us two, and I truly meant every word I said to ever and only you
You say that I opened up your heart, that I made an impact on your life, but we both know it was the wrong one, to you I was never right
You’re right you did nothing wrong to me you only opened up yourself to show me what lied within, and I dallied in your manifestations until the bitter end

Maybe I was lying to myself believing that I was deserving of you, maybe I was lying to you because maybe you knew it too
Reflecting on it all you’re not the one to blame, you loved me immensely through it all, through the pain
You cried yourself to sleep screaming into the dark, asking me to rescue you but my love back then I had no heart
I know that you missed me because I was missing you, but I had to cut off my emotions and untie myself from you

I claim to you that I have moved on that all on my end is well, I would never admit to you that every day I fight the demons that I have inside of me where in my hearts place is a padded cell
You say that you pray for me daily and my love what more could one ask of? Your soul is just too precious for my type of love
I know that you have overcome the pain you have wiped the tears away, and you’ll never know how happy I am for you that your life turned out this way
Now I’m the one in the darkness, the one fighting for each breath he takes, because I realize what I lost back then and now it’s much too late

You did it my love you can let me hold the candle that still burns for our love, maybe one day it will be ignited again by the power of our love
The power that you now hold because you my love you played your part, you did everything you could to love me, but I was foolish from the start
So, my love go on bittersweetly whisper goodbye, you have survived the pain that I bestowed to you but did I?
Just know that this candle I hold symbolizes the hope that will forever remain, I only wish that you hadn’t survived me so that you could once more whisper my name.

Copyright © Amanda Kinzer | Year Posted 2023

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