.x.Untitled.X.
The dark merlot stains my lips blood-red
Casting me in a vampire light
The bottle sits half empty by my elbow
As silent and motionless as I
We keep each other company, the bottle and me
Two cynical sentinels keeping watch over the shadows of night
Passing the endless minutes between the witching hour and dawn
I am the only soul alive
Or so it seems
My heartbeat keeps time
An errant scudding watch piece
The blood flows sluggishly through my veins
No, not blood
A distilled mixture of regret and impotent frustration
My life has been a farce
A series of cruel jokes played upon me
By some Puckish divinity
Hurdle after hurdle has been erected in my path
Wall after wall has loomed before me
Against which I slammed my aching head
Beating out my brains with no hope of reward
Or comfort
With no respite from the arduous grind
Struggling, always struggling
That is the story of my life
Striving in vain to rise above the ash-grey mists of despair
Well not any longer, not anymore, oh no
Now I sit still
Quiet and masochistically content in my failure
You could almost say I’m wallowing
With nowhere to go why bother to travel
Why take even one more bitter step down this screwed up pointless road?
It all amounts to nothing in the end
We all finish up just skulls with a few withered strands of hair
The wind whistling between our browned teeth a grim mockery of breath
Why waste my final resources in a valiant attempt at resurrection
There is no hope for me
I am lost, I am dead
Another nameless face amongst the wandering dead
With no one to soothe my aching heart
No one to rub salve into the bloody weal across my soul
Only this bottle of wine beside me
Dulling the agony of a thousand defeats
And sopping up my dusty tears
As the endless Night slides, serpentine, by
Copyright © Amy Van De Casteele | Year Posted 2009
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