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Williams Since 1066

First a quick word on Robert the Devil,
whose turbulent  life turned out quite a revel.
He fathered a child on a poor tanner's daughter
then dashed to repent in Jerusalem's quarter,
but on his return, sad to say, he died,
yet he set up his son, his only pride.
Though being dubbed "bastard" earned him rebuke
Son William became a very tough duke,
as shown by the fact he became England's king
on Christmas Day when the church bells did ring.
Poor England he ruled with a grim  iron rod.
He harried the North like a merciless god.
To gauge England's wealth great pains he took,
which to prove I name the Doomsday Book.
Once  his horse took fright  in a fiery melee
and part of his saddle punctured his belly.
After this mishap he did not live long.
When his belly burst, oh what a pong!
The monks in Rouen cut his funeral short,
when  incense galore  no remedy brought.
Then his son William Rufus ascended the throne.
To wild fits and frenzy this redhead was prone.
He found city life somewhat too narrow.
Out riding one day, he was struck by an arrow.

Many hard battles King Billy fought
ere he fell from his horse at Hampton Court.
No enemy's musket laid him low,
no cannon ball , no swordsman's blow.
A hoof of his horse got caught in a hole,
the work of a lowly burrowing mole.
On the Emerald  Isle some raise a toast
to this  notable victory of the least o'er the most

William the Fourth died in his bed,
which somehow fitted the life he had led.
He had multiple children but not with his wife.
Exemplary no way  was King William's life.

When in time a new William mounts Britain’s throne
may he shun the errors to which others were prone,
avoiding pitfalls and fierce martial strife,
and every enticement to stray from his wife.

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