Why Cant We Be Friends

Allow me to dream, please? BFF’s…? No. Oh ok, I'm sorry I asked again, Can’t we just… NO, oh ok..ok, but you said someday when I found someone else, you said so… NO... you did though, hey no yelling, you promised you would stop yelling at me... Don't you remember? They tell me to accept you, but I’m not sure they see how you treat me. Eventually… that’s funny, be patient, ha, love her, haha thats impossible, find her potential, see her strengths, focus on the positive, glory in her successes and hide how she really makes you feel, ...wait what? Shh, find someone she says, but there's no one, you’re not trying. I keep telling you I am and that's the problem! Why can’t our friendship be good enough,why... just keep looking… we are not enough...i know... ok I’ll Keep looking, but it hurts and you don't seem to care, it hurts like fire, scorching hope after dream after hope. Midnight, past one, it’s 2:28 in the morning, let me sleep! Please, NO, we are not enough, fill the void that Your burning heart has left in our chest, open your mouth and try, but they don’t see! Please listen to me…, it hurts every time they look through me, every time they look over me, everytime they assume; quit trying to tape something that needs to be healed. Please realize that we must see, and then they might...ok, Try it, but it won’t work. Give me the key, I’ll unlock the positive, happy, optimistic thoughts you keep from me, and then we’ll see. Verging on the unknown, the untried territory of you believing in me, Why did I believe that our X-rays showed a mistake when they show a miracle? All these years, for so long, you hurt me, with crippling words, NO more. I am leaving your circle, your zone of hate, but I forgive you, please… accept the new me.