What Turns the Lady On
Lady Fingers is from the House of Kent
The House of Lords would not accept her
Royal lineage apparently must be respected
Her family coat of arms hangs on the wall
The shield has nicks and dents from wars
History suggests she was not in attendance
Though her face and age show otherwise
Battle scars should not be ignored
Lady Fingers is delicate and demur
Her petticoat drags along the marble floor
She keeps her figure by eating only figs
An index finger and a thumb hold tea
The key to the chastity belt is long gone
Not to worry
The combination to the madame's heart is easy
One turn to the right to 9, twice to the left to 7
Another rotation clockwise till you reach 2
The Lady's safe is safe from all intruders
Including you you silly goose
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