What Is This Really

The feeling of cold glass accompanied by A aroma of hops against my lips only helped so much My thoughts viciously unbaring... One would say It would be better lifeless Truly it's more of my fault than yours You are not to blame for my lack of strength when it comes to loving an losing I pull It together Losing myself was putting me In danger causing me to lie with no reason I wouldnt lose like that to myself.. I learned how to appreciate being alone rather than surrounding myself with people & noise to distract my own mind I was smoking cigarettes on patios Only thinking about the grey Numbing myself with vodka sprite Recklessly pondering at night I started chasing my dream again after being in the dark for long it was exhausting I'm back to singing as If I was a bird chirping bright an early with a reason to live The reason Is I know I have so much to lose & so much to live for Nothing says I have to forget you or hate you A lesson learned as they would say "was to good to be true" My luck is terrible an my timing Is crap The universe will work It's wonders If an only If we are meant to be I believe In miracles Until then I shall continue building myself up stronger an proceed healing every day