What If I Meet a Polar Bear Today

What will I do if I meet a polar bear in the wild?
It depends.  If I am scared I will hide in my red and black wool plaid sleeping bag, and play dead.
Hoping he does not paw me out and eat me or rip my sleeping bag apart with his mighty teeth before they sink into my soft pink unwilling flesh.
If I am delighted when I come across my polar bear I might take a selfie with her.
It could be posted after my death as it most probably will be my last selfie, especially if she has a cub.
If I feel feisty I might dare the polar bear to a fish-eating contest, but if the shrimp is the fish, and they
Are fried, or toasted in coconut with sweet tangy orange sauce, I will win, and then probably get chased and eaten.
Damn.
I am beginning to see a little pattern here.
Copyright © | Year Posted 2018

Poem

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Mcferran Avatar
September 25, 2018 at 12:30 AM
Another funny one- love this! ;D
Krutsinger Avatar
September 25, 2018 at 12:57 AM
I am SO glad as I thought this was the best poem I ever tried.
Kiser Avatar
September 23, 2018 at 4:14 PM
Yes, there's definitely a pattern... a great one.
Krutsinger Avatar
September 24, 2018 at 10:48 PM
This is like my favorite poem of my own poems. I showed it to my 11-year-old grandson, who loved it.
Get a Premium Membership
Turn off ads, get more exposure for your poetry, and get more features with a Premium Membership.
Book: Diverse Voices: The Poetry of Human Rights and the Pursuit of Peace