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Upon Further Reflection

If only not so lonely,
Perhaps then I might see:
How two are one, but when we're we
That I am you and you are me.

*Rhyme Battle 2 Contest Entry

relationshiprhyme

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Debbie Guzzi

March 22, 2014 at 3:09 PM

I'm reading Chan. Light & Love

Laura Breidenthal

January 2, 2014 at 1:22 AM

This is a nice, pensive write. Simple, but very nice. Always, Laura

Just That Archaic Poet

January 3, 2014 at 1:37 PM

I appreciate the compliment, Laura :)

Robin Davis

October 25, 2013 at 5:05 PM

Chan This is a deep and thought provoking write. Makes the reader reflect on life and whats important. Nice job my friend My Puppet Master poem is not really happening. So you don't have to whoop any butt. LOL but I appreciate the offer. Hugs

Just That Archaic Poet

October 26, 2013 at 6:49 AM

Many thanks and much love to you, my sweet friend :)

Kelly Deschler

September 11, 2013 at 5:17 PM

I loved this poem! Wonderful work! Adding it to my favorites! I have struggled with loneliness and self identity for awhile. How people see me on the outside, does not reflect who I am on the inside. That is what my poem "Dark Angel", is all about...Thank you for reading and commenting kindly on my poem. I really appreciate it!

Just That Archaic Poet

September 11, 2013 at 5:23 PM

I sincerely appreciate that, Kelly. Your poem was really cool. I love it when the imagery is so strong, I feel like I am right there, in the poem itself :)

Karen Anglesey

September 11, 2013 at 6:23 AM

Comments to the comments....Reason A Poteet...her comments are finally the voice of Reason (pun intended). I have read some of her work and I think she teaches literature. Her work is impeccable, like yours. Danesh and John, Oh my, they haven't a clue but thank you for trying to give them one :)

Just That Archaic Poet

September 11, 2013 at 9:32 AM

Check your SoupMail, my dear; my heart is bursting with happiness! :D

Danesh Morgan

August 29, 2013 at 8:15 AM

greetings thou you have done quite well i do believe the mistake the last poet mention about is on the third line , but when we're we . . . is not correct nor does it sound so but that's not meant to be but who are we? are two example i think adding a we ending is very hard but maybe you can think a better phase. .

Just That Archaic Poet

August 29, 2013 at 8:52 AM

The contraction is supposed to mean, "but when we are we"; eliminating the contraction and using "when we are we" throws off the rhythm. I see why it's problematic, but if you read "we're" and understand it means "we are", then perhaps that will help it make more sense. Hope that clarifies. Thanks for the review! :)

Richard Lamoureux

August 19, 2013 at 7:39 AM

You will find the people here very nice, it is an excellent community. At times there will be drama, sometimes people's spirits can be riled after all poets tend to feel emotions with intensity. However if you offer others grace they will respond in kind. No one is expected to be perfect. I hope you enjoy. Welcome to the soup.

Just That Archaic Poet

August 19, 2013 at 8:01 AM

Thus far, everyone has been wonderful and welcoming and I'm glad to have found a place like this :)

Skat A

August 17, 2013 at 11:05 PM

CONGRATS on having your poem featured this week........ Love ~ SKAT ~

Poet Destroyer A

August 17, 2013 at 10:08 PM

Hi JTPA, . Congratulations!!! It's nice to see your poem Featured on the soups Home Page, this past week :-) goodnight~ Luv* LINDA *

Just That Archaic Poet

August 5, 2013 at 1:13 PM

Thanks again for the read and responses; I appreciate the positive feedback. I've had a lot of bad experiences on other poetry sharing sites; I hope this place is different.

Skat A

August 3, 2013 at 9:18 PM

awesome...SKAT

Poet Destroyer A

August 2, 2013 at 9:43 PM

Just The A.Poet, , -A nice warm WELCOME to poetry soup. Dropping by to invite you to my latest contest. You will find the contest page on the top left hand side* -Looking forward in following and reading your poetry. Hope to hear from you soon. You will enjoy the community, we are one big happy family. (Drama & Love. LOL) ~ Take Care!! From: your new poet friend @-> LINDA <-@ ....

Just That Archaic Poet

August 19, 2013 at 6:35 PM

Much <3 to you, Linda (and everyone else, also). Thank you all for the warm welcome :)

John Posey

August 2, 2013 at 12:57 PM

Very warm..... when figured out.... Nice writing.... Jake

Anne-Lise Andresen

August 2, 2013 at 8:33 AM

Hello new member: J.T.A.P.- Welcome to P-Soup. - Thank you for choosing to share your poems here with us. - I look forward to reading more in the future. - Have a good time and I wish you luck. - (Give and receive comments) - oxox / / Anne-Lise :)

Upon Further Reflection

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