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Unwanted Internet Adverts - Bawdy

Svetlana appeared on my computer today
She’s so pretty, it can’t be denied
But I'm happily married for 26 years
So I don’t need an Internet bride!

Oh crikey an email advert has just popped up
It’s one that I’m embarrased to mention
But I’m female (I’ve checked) and I’m certain 
That I don’t need a penile extension!

A some what tongue in cheek poem 

05~22~17

Copyright © Jan Allison | Year Posted 2017

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Jean Murray Date: 5/24/2017 6:47:00 AM Very apt Jan. And funny as always. Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 5/24/2017 11:58:00 AM I had fun with this poem Jean:-) hugs Jan xx

Connie Marcum Wong Date: 5/22/2017 11:04:00 PM Very good Jan. I can usually ignore the ads but the other day they had a picture of this really big ugly Roach, after looking at that I really didn't feel like reading poetry. : )7 Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 5/23/2017 5:30:00 AM I was so happy when son installed an ad blocker about 2 years ago , now I am forced to have the ads so I can access my soup account - grrr and double grrr:-( hugs jan xx

Arthur Vaso Date: 5/22/2017 4:25:00 PM Its not only the adds, is the format and too many, but at the least I wouild think there should be a few psychiatric adds!! LOL So funny! Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 5/23/2017 5:29:00 AM Now here's an idea if they custom made ads for us that would be good Darren - I could have ones for toilet paper for my poop poems lol:-) hugs Jan xx Darren White Date: 5/23/2017 2:00:00 AM I have one above for food.... XXL food.... for someone who is almost anorexic like me LOL Jan Allison Date: 5/22/2017 4:55:00 PM Now if they had an ad for mending computer's you threw through the window in frustration at the ads THAT would be worth looking at lol:-) hugs jan xx Tim Smith Date: 5/22/2017 4:44:00 PM There's one above for investment advice. Jan Allison Date: 5/22/2017 4:32:00 PM Hey I will need psychiatric treatment if I took these ads seriously lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Jerry T Curtis Date: 5/22/2017 4:19:00 PM I thought everybody wanted an extension---Hilarious Jan, you know the woman in the picture looks familiar to me, then again all girls holding hammers look the same to me lol Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 5/22/2017 4:31:00 PM LOL Jerry maybe the blokes would be interested but I for one don't think it is suitable for me lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Anne-Lise Andresen Date: 5/22/2017 2:39:00 PM - Love it, Jan :) - Every day .... I get a bouquet of temptations .... Viagra is a winner on my computer ... may I need it .... it's sales !!! .... minus 70% .... if I buy two packages .... a lot of money to save ..... :))) - hugs // Anne-Lise :) Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 5/22/2017 2:45:00 PM ha ha ha - Anne Lise I get e mails and now have to turn on my ad unblocker so I can access the site just to post poems and make comments - grr. The emails go straight in the trash and the ads I just click on to get rid of them and not read them but they do frustrate me so much!:-( hugs jan xx

Carol B. Date: 5/22/2017 2:04:00 PM Hilarious you always make me laugh :). Must admit I can relate to the girl in the picture when I am having computer problems. Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 5/22/2017 2:06:00 PM I've had to remove my ad blocker so I can access soup and comment and post poems - arghhhhhhhh:-( The internet bride was an old ad I used to get on soup before my son installed the ad blocker and the e mails go in the trash can I need neither an implant or Viagra yet still get those unwanted mails lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Kim Rodrigues Date: 5/22/2017 12:02:00 PM LOL, Jan! You always go there! You and my sis would be pals! ;) Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 5/22/2017 12:07:00 PM Do you get her to visit soup and start writing too !!! I write this poem in less than 2 minutes Kim. Until yesterday the adds on the site were blocked now I just click them off but they are infuriating and of no interest to me and as for the emails I get they get binned straight away lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Dale Gregory Cozart Date: 5/22/2017 12:00:00 PM I love this. Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 5/22/2017 12:04:00 PM Thanks Dale lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Maurice Rigoler Date: 5/22/2017 10:10:00 AM Got a good chuckle out of this one, Jan. Thanks for the stop by. / M Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 5/22/2017 10:45:00 AM I'm quite aggrieved Maurice - I get adverts for internet brides never internet husbands - now there is a niche market for an entrepreneur lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Darren White Date: 5/22/2017 8:47:00 AM Hahaha, so funny Jan, also Tim and Chris, you make me lol. I don't know why, but on my one browser without ad blocker, I always get breast implant ads.... Login to Reply Darren White Date: 5/22/2017 12:03:00 PM That's tooooo funny Tim :D Jan Allison Date: 5/22/2017 11:20:00 AM ha ha ha ha ha:-) hugs Jan xx Tim Smith Date: 5/22/2017 11:03:00 AM Are you using Art's account?? Jan Allison Date: 5/22/2017 10:45:00 AM I will swap you that ad for the penile implants one lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Tim Smith Date: 5/22/2017 7:41:00 AM Lol... awesome...if you are looking for a contractor I know where to find one. Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 5/22/2017 10:48:00 AM ha ha ha - I had an advert just popped up - how to rate Donald Trump like as if I am interested in that - no relevance to me at all lol:-( hugs Jan xx

Chris Green Date: 5/22/2017 7:26:00 AM Well, I heard it makes the perfect Christmas gift. :) This was funny Jan. Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 5/22/2017 2:08:00 PM Gosh I can imagine the election coverage must have been a complete nightmare for you Chris - we are lucky on our little Island we have local politicians to elect and just get a few leaflets through the door and the odd visitor on the doorstep and it only lasts a very short time:-) hugs Jan xx Chris Green Date: 5/22/2017 11:02:00 AM Ha, I wrote to the admin and complained many months ago about having to see Hilary's face every time I signed on...so I guess we are even. :) Jan Allison Date: 5/22/2017 10:43:00 AM I don't like the new way the comments are either - was fine before and I did have an ad block on for over 2 years so now having to see the blasted things is even more irritating - just had one on how to rate Donald Trump - like do I care - arghhhhhhhh:-( hugs Jan xx Chris Green Date: 5/22/2017 8:03:00 AM Ha, maybe Tim. Jan, I don't know how to block ads or unblock them but I had the same problem a few weeks ago with that same thing but I had my screen font enlarged and once I moved it back to default size the problem ended. I just don't like how the screens have changed with the reply icon just above the head of the avatar of the previous commenter. Very confusing. Tim Smith Date: 5/22/2017 7:39:00 AM Lol...you hinting : )) Jan Allison Date: 5/22/2017 7:35:00 AM LOL Chris - I had an ad blocker on but now it has to be enabled so I can access the site. Whilst I understand the need to get income from adverts I just find it an annoyance and now I have to click and turn off each ad. I am not interested in what they are offering and don't even read them it really is so irritating that we cannot disable them and get on with what is important and that's poetry - yesterday I couldn't even comment as this 'banner' kept covering the whole screen - arghhhhhhhhh:-( hugs Jan xx