Until It Does

Deep in silence I focus on my pain I've kept it buried below and softly away Disabling all of my false and insecure pride Filtering through the faces I keep disguised Its been well overdue for me to make a change While my words become like rotting fruit and falls away Searching for something to mend a shattered heart Insearch of inspiration, but instead I fell apart Give me a pair of wings and watch me fly Then watch me crash and burn out of the sky I know that my plate is made warm for me on the table As I begin to wonder if I will change at all Honestly I'm not sure that I can Behind a box of excuses you will find a man With a heart so big and wants to save the world But yet so selfish that my punishment is well deserved I'm so tired of defending what I'm not and have become And still I keep pretending that nothing is wrong Throw me the obvious and I will wear it on my back As the summer night illuminates memories I can't have I know that my dinner is getting cold as I grow unstable Uncertainty has become all but a poetic fable But I will keep on digging until the whole is dug As the hole keeps getting bigger with every plunge Tomorrow doesnt exsist until it comes So tonight I light a candle for hope until it does *JJF* 4/18/2013