-until-

I hold your letters in my hands, 
The words wrapped in swirls of trembling, yet vivid, lovely, handwriting

Bits and pieces of yourself, of your life, the precious life, that you shared with me
Telling me such little details...of the dress you bought, or perhaps the squirrel in the yard
                  or a brief accounting of the rain that came one morning...

                    Snippets of a life that went unnoticed, seemed unremarkable

Until......until you were gone.
Until I began to realize that I wouldn't have a second chance...another day
       to pay closer attention, to ask more questions, ...to show more interest
          to look deeper into your wisdom, your eyes, and see the clarity that comes with age...

Your caring,...your patience....your understanding...
That in my neglectful ways, I thought would always be there...

These letters I hold in my hand...ending with words of love....that perhaps I didn't deserve...
              
You would have said, "I understand"...."It's all right", ..."I forgive you"

But,........ can I, ...will I, .... forgive myself?
Copyright © | Year Posted 2010

Poem

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Brown Avatar
January 13, 2011 at 11:29 AM
Congratulations Carrie on your win in "Annalise's Contest". Love, Carol
Onclaud Avatar
January 9, 2011 at 7:10 PM
love the way this unfolded, carrie.. super best cheers for the win.. :) nette
Radke Avatar
January 9, 2011 at 2:35 PM
Congratulations. This is excellent. And true. And filled with sadness, and hope. Very good. Deb
Freeman Avatar
January 9, 2011 at 10:18 AM
Amazing Narrative Carrie, Congratulations on your honored poem. Agape, Moses
Sweetheart Avatar
January 9, 2011 at 9:45 AM
Congrats Carrie on your wonderful win in Audrey's great contest with this excellent entry ... enjoy another top ten with luv..
Mannan Avatar
January 9, 2011 at 6:21 AM
many congratulations dear Carrie for this win.
Mehta Avatar
January 9, 2011 at 6:17 AM
Congratulations on this well deserved win in the contest of Audrey, Carrie
Neels Avatar
January 9, 2011 at 3:21 AM
Carrie, your words has so much power behind it.. Congratulations on your win in Audrey's contest.. Love and smiles with this one ;-) Wilma
Johnson Avatar
January 8, 2011 at 9:48 PM
Very nice. We should all mend our fences because we do not know that we will hae another chance. LCongratulaitos, Love, Joyce
Haick Avatar
January 8, 2011 at 7:46 PM
Thank you for supporting my contest, Carrie! Congratulations! Love, Audrey
Devonshire Avatar
January 8, 2011 at 7:39 PM
Congratulations on your win with this outstanding poem, Carrie! Love, Carolyn
Falotico Avatar
December 11, 2010 at 3:05 PM
strong powerful touching write...emotions flow through this work of art....nice work Carrie
Devonshire Avatar
December 10, 2010 at 1:23 PM
Your poem is a powerful reminder that we have to show love and interest every time we have the opportunity, Carrie. But please forgive yourself. If this person truly loved you, they would not want you to harbor guilt. If you enter this in the forgiveness contest, it will surely be a winner. So moving! Peace and blessings, Carolyn
Brown Avatar
December 9, 2010 at 5:21 AM
I feel it Carrie. I do this quite often myself. You have written a wonderful piece here. I can't answer your question but I hope we can. Love, Carol
Mehta Avatar
December 9, 2010 at 4:43 AM
Very soft and touchy introspective thoughts , Carrie
Onclaud Avatar
December 8, 2010 at 8:34 PM
heart-wrenching yet so full of deep visualizations... you gripped my heart because it's easier to forgive others than the self!! awesome; a lucky streak in the contest! warmest, nette
Goff Avatar
December 8, 2010 at 6:01 PM
Carrie....I think of things all the time I wish I would have asked my Pop...I usually sleep on it, and sometimes the answers come to me....jimbo
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