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Unquotable Quotes - Iii

     Unquotable quotes -  III

When in Rome, do as the Roman Nero.
The rain in Spain falls mainly on the vain and the 
         insane.
A grenade a day keeps the refugee away.
Cut your coat according to your girth.
The kettle calling the pot back.
Like father, like son; like mother, like neither.
Singing in the rain can get you pain in Spain.
Singing in the rain in Paris can get you chicks who do 
             the twist with fairies.
A sound heart in a sick body is like a tart groggy with 
             toddy.
The sun also rises best in the West.
Who said beggars are not choosers: they can choose the  
             place and moment they beg.
A white tiger abhors orange.
A policeman’s girl always wears handcuffs behind her 
            back.
A lawyer who licks the back of hands always gets paid 
           first.
A judge who yells at you tends to reduce the sentence to 
           a phrase.
Building castles in the air with sand is cheaper by far.
A marathon runner remembers the thighs but not the 
            laps.
At the end of the day is when you make your greatest 
           mistake – you go to sleep.
Churn milk to make curd: churn speech to make turd.
Pounding rice as a marriage rite brings no surprise on 
            the wedding night.
One swallow doesn’t make a drunkard out of a 
           teetotaller, but it sure signals a dry summer.

                   Cricketing jargon

The late-cut is the shave you missed out.
The off-cut is the cover drive turned phut.
The leg-pull is the batsman’s bras de fer to the leg 
        spinner.
The long-stop is the twelth man on the field.
The straight drive pierces the umpire’s reverie.
The full-toss is the fast bowler’s slipped disc.
The ton-up comes after the spin bowlers give up.
The innings defeat is the army beating the retreat.
Test matches end up in ditches for pitches.
A bumper is an un-coded message from the bowler to the 
         batsman.
A bumper is an overt warning to the inveterate blocker.
Tail-enders get to face the best batsmen all-rounders.
Umpires inspect pitches at the start of a match for coins
	dropped by lawn-mowers.
An over-throw is a fielded ball flung by an outfielder at 
     the umpires and which misses the wickets by miles.

© T. Wignesan – Paris,  2016

Copyright © | Year Posted 2016




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