Treasure Hunt
One Tuesday evening recently with the house empty but me,
I thought I’d spread out on the couch and see what’s on the ‘telly’.
It was close to half past eight and so I thought I’d watch ‘The Bill’,
and catch up with the pommy cops who plod around ‘Sun Hill’.
I’d pulled the ring top off a stubby and got meself a bag of chips
for me to dip into a jar of one of them bitey salsa dips.
Now I’m settled down upon the couch with me feet up off the floor,
and wouldn’t you just know it - there’s a knock upon the door.
Three little kids were standing there; one with paper in his hand.
And the eldest wouldn’t yet be six, so I couldn’t understand,
who’d let their kids out on the street here in the fading light,
to go knocking on a stranger’s door at this hour of the night.
At first I thought ‘its Halloween!’ So this is trick or treat,
and the kids were wanting me to give them something sweet.
I asked them if they wanted humbugs, gobstoppers or rumball,
but the three all looked confused ‘cause it ain’t Halloween at all.
So then the eldest shook his head - his answer it was blunt,
“No mister, no it’s not! We’re out upon a treasure hunt.
We’ve found twenty of the twenty-five, treasures that we seek,
but we have to find the other five - can you help us so to speak”.
“What’s on your list?” I asked, and he read out in slow motion,
“There’s three grains of oats; an empty bottle of hand lotion.
A chop bone and four sardine tins; the wings off seven dragonflies -
and once we get the twenty five we get a dollar for a prize!”
“Well that’s a challenge!” So I said, but I thought I smelt a rat.
So I asked them who invented a treasure hunt like that.
They sort of smirked and looked away, but finally in the end,
the middle fella quietly said - “Our babysitter’s boyfriend!”
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