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Tormenting Thoughts

It's clear to see.
Time.
Fate.
It was just a matter of time until
fate would bring an end to you and me.
It seems that people always try to hold onto things that refuse to be held.
Try to control the uncontrollable.
And neglect change as if change cares about your wants and needs.
I heard this saying many times before.
"If you want to make God laugh, tell Him what you have planned."
I lost count of how many times I've made Him laugh and cry.
I've lost count of how many times he's taught me lessons that led to tears.
Any smile that came about was to disguise the pain.
Any laugh that followed was just to keep from crying.
If a tear was shed, one would think it was from laughter.
My pessimism is here to show courtesy to my well-being.
Any optimistic perceptions would be an insult to my intelligence.

Gravity.
An essence of mankind.
Has taught me more than any school system ever could.
The balance of life.
Rise is always followed by decline.
Inclination isn't promised.
I apologize to my God and soul for my ignored blessings.
I tend to be ungrateful.
Missing out on the obvious things that should be honored and appreciated.
All due to my thoughts that the outcome will be ill-fated.
While aware of this sad mental state,
I cannot rid the burden.
I continue to internalize negativity
and reject any reflection of positivity.
I know I should be grateful for my blessings
and for the educators we call tragedy.
Because they make me stronger and wiser.
But I know as the world continues to spin,
so will the cycle of gratuity and misfortune.

Copyright © M.N.I.W M.N.I.W | Year Posted 2015

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