Tim In the Skies

I woke up screaming from one of my dreams. Stuck my face in a pillow to muffle the screams. It's hard to watch someone else die. Are you up there watching as I search the sky? I'm looking for answers. God gives me a few. The answers are empty down here without you. I should have died. Not you my dear friend. You just tried to help me and I dreamed it again. The knife in your heart. Your eyes that just stared. I hate to admit this but I was so scared. I was the first one to fall to the floor. Kicked,beaten,and stabbed. But there would be more. I curled into a ball and I should have stayed there. Frank and your brother appeared and both asked me,"where?" I pointed as they ran. there were to many to fight. But they both rushed right in. It was satan's delight. I got up and followed. Didn't know what else to do. I walked right through the carnage and that's when I saw you. You asked me what happened. But I was out of my mind. I said I was jumped and then we both looked behind. There was your brother falling with ten guys on him and like Frank and Dan you just rushed right in. We both watched in horror as Dan curled into a ball. Then you grabbed this guy and threw him into the wall. Then everything was slow motion. Guys were flying through the air. I could barely see anything but all I did was stare. You were making them run but one still wanted to fight. That's when I rushed in. He had this big knife. I got there too late. I grabbed you where you fell. The look in your eyes is my own private hell. You died in my arms. Some of me died there too. It's been thirty years now. Thirty years without you. Why did it happen Lord? Will I ever know? Will Tim ever forgive me? Do I want to know? A nightmare that lives after I close my eyes. A dream that makes me search for Tim in the skies. For my Best friend Tim Gitchel who was murdered on 2/12/1979 in Oxnard CA at the movie theatre when we tried to see The Warriors. I miss you buddy. RIP