Throw Me a Bone
A wee bit of humor based on this Mark Parisi cartoon.
Chasing me was a cop flashing red and blue lights
I refused the breathalyzer, so he read me my rights
He didn't buy my excuse of having had the zoomies
He said, "In jail, you'll have lots of zoomie roomies."
I told him I'd cooperate and would walk the line
He agreed to that and said I'd just have to pay a fine
for doing seventy-five while driving in a school zone
and if I past the inebriated test he'd throw me a bone
I took his comment to mean he was being sarcastic
but I just smiled at him and said, "Gee. That's fantastic."
I grabbed my beer and took a one last long guzzle.
He called me beligerent and reached for a muzzle.
He said he had no pity for such a disrespectful mutt
I kept laughing and saying, "I'm not being a smart butt."
He called me a low life, punk dog and drove me to jail
Quipped, "Your attitude sucks! You won't get out on bail!"
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