Thoughts

Sorry is what I get and sorry is what I hear. A word I loath so much, like needles piercing my ears. Love is a word I hear and love is the word I get but It doesn't mean a thing when it spills from your lips. Promises get made and promises got broken, like a none ending cycle because no one knows how to be real anymore. Each time your let down your heart dies a little more, close to being life less and completely shut off, to all who try to reach for it. Each tear that slips from your eyes and all the hurt that rises in side breaks you to nothing because you just can't take it anymore. You feel at your lowest, feel so unwanted. Because so far everything just goes wrong. But yet you get back up and you’re ready to love again because that day can be your last; you risk it all and remind your self to regret noting. You hold your head tall and promise your self "never again will I let them see me fall" you build up Walls and let no one in close enough to be able to break your heart but you to break there's. You listen to know one because. You’re afraid its just evils lies that can leek through your ears. You notice a lot has changed and a lot is different and wish sometimes it can just be simple again but it can't that thought scares you to the core of change in your life you may not bargain for. You know that is life though so you keep trudging on trying to find more but afraid to let it in. One day you will ask your self "what am I doing here anyways, why am I here?" Because your life is not as perfect as you want and so much happens you just can't stand it anymore so you push away all that is close to you. Till you have nothing left anymore. All you knew is unknown and all you are is long gone. So you don't even know who you are anymore. And think back to those days when it was easy and great when you had it all. Why you can’t go back and to it all again?