Thn, But, This, and Now

i used to bee the T'keyah Thatt - Laughed at others whn they were hurt, cared only about myself, played entirely too muchh, thought i wus [above] othrs whn it came to my education, tried to be bestfriends with the teacher, only went places with Alexis Rutherford always put it in my head that i would NEVER disappoint my mother, & stayed mad at my father because he wus never in my lifee . . , but thn - middle school camee alonee, boys caught my eyes, teachers weren't like they were at Vineville Academy, my mind became maturer thn my agee, i wus introduced to more thangs for older kids, i convinced myself to question my father about thangs i wantd to know & i looked at life wayyyy differennt . Thiss Causedd - me to separate myself from others, my mind to wonder on . . me to act up jus for attention, mee to do the thangs my mind wondered about, me to understand why my daddy wus never here [im still trying to understand] & mee to do simple thangs to fit in , but only to find out that once its gone, you never get it back:/ But Noww - I'm that T'Keyah who - is always smilingg always helping others forever giving advice even whn i cnt take my own, always waiting for others to realize that once I'm gone, you'll regret the way you treated me, always crushing on someone, always laughingg cause its just that fun, always makingg ppl smile even whn i'm down in the dumps myself, always crying behind closed doors// always blaming herself always lying to herself to make her believe certain thangs. is missing her uncle jay thinks nobody loves her, always questioning "Why" on her life from back in the past, BUT NEVER regretting any of it, because at one point in time. . that's exactly what she wanted:))