They Have Millions of Dollars To Share With Me

They Have Millions of Dollars to Share With Me

By Elton Camp

From a gaggle of strangers I’ve earned great trust
To share huge riches with me they say they must
I now get these types of e-mails every single day
But there is a strange uniformity in what they say

Although in such friendship they declare they came,
How strange none of them seem to know my name
Greeting will be “Dear Friend” or some other term
To which I always wish I could say, “Hello worm”

But their own supposed names they will always declare
But insert “Mr.” or “Rev.” or “Dr.” or “Mrs.” in there
As if by some self-proclaimed title I’ll be impressed 
And thus more likely as I read to believe all the rest

Some claim of some horrible disease they’re dying
And that to make things right with God they’re trying
Part of their money to good causes I’m to give away
But a big percentage—it’s with me it should stay 

In other cases, their client, father or mate is now dead
But they have a most generous plan built in their head
They will claim that they have control of a bank account
And that it is millions of bucks, an astonishing amount

In return for allowing them to share the riches with me
I will need only to show good faith by sending a fee
And they urge me to keep confidence & not tell a soul
Especially not to tell the bank that assets are to be stole

Some are dumb and greedy enough to agree no doubt
Otherwise, they wouldn’t keep sending the e-mail out
Anybody who can be deceived by this type of scram
Is most surely a whole lot more gullible than I am
Copyright © | Year Posted 2011

Poem

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Hendricks Avatar
June 22, 2011 at 1:14 AM
Dear Mr/Mrs/Rev/Dr Spammer/Scammer, I'm sorry to hear you have but 2 months to live and untold millions to spend. Thank you for choosing me, a total stranger, as your beneficiary. I hold an account with the Bank of Idiots. My account number is 0123456789 and my password is STOOOPID. Now hurry up and die. From Dear Friend. Nice one, Elton. I liiiiike. :))
Camp Avatar
June 22, 2011 at 4:45 AM
What a witty reply! Thanks for taking the time to comment. Within an hour after I posted this poem, I got ANOTHER of those e-mails and yet another was waiting for me this morning. Elton
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