These Damn Farts

When I'm around people, they soon depart. They don't like it because I constantly fart. People always get offended because I pass gas. I farted in front of Daddy and he kicked my ass. I constantly have to find new friends because these farts are rude. I eat pinto beans three times a day, maybe I should eat other foods. I just farted and now I've lost another friend. I hate these loud and smelly discharges that come from my rearend. (THIS IS A FICTIONAL POEM.)