There Once Was a Woman

There once was a woman, There once was a man, The most illogical combo, Since raisins and bran, Dissimilar parts, Grey matter disparity, Which leads to amounts, Of subjective hilarity, Both must crave sex, For prolonged propagation, With cooperative output, When induced by libation, And, that's where it ends, Except when homo-ignited, Where friends are just friends, Unless you know you're invited, One shops, spends, depletes, All resources existing, As the other just bellows, But never resisting, Because the woman has power, She cripples on sight, Controlling money and love, With sticky, sweet dynamite, And unless he's released, By some self, manmade plan, He shall bend at the knees, To avoid showing his hand, Then by divine intervention, The Spring turns to Fall, And the power of fem, Conquered by any football, And if somehow constructed, The perfect male ideal, Sex-craved, mute, girly servant, Who would spoon feed each meal, Nice dream, but not real, Because the woman is numb, She simply continues to charge, Until the max has been sung, Which is where compromise rises, Damned do or do not, Because slap happy mediums, Keep intact, all they got, And regardless of structure, Sans kids, pets and bills, No ticket or viewing, Can induce such raw thrills, So, my friend, you're a man, Yes, you're brilliant and certain, With logic and reason, To encounter any, all burdens, But, one last remark, As you wink at that lass, Prepare both heads for the lessons, That you'll learn in her class. (11/9/00)