The Warts

When I was just a kid I loved to play with frogs I found them varmits everywhere Even under logs I'd catch them and I'd hold them Until they peed on me Then I'd throw a crying fit And let them suckers free Sometimes they peed a lot Maybe even quarts Then my mama told me Them frogs will give you warts Of couse, I didn't believe her But, you know how the story goes For by the time I was a teenager There were warts growing on my nose The girls thought I was ugly So I never got a date I knew I'd never get married And loneliness was my fate And then, I met this woman Who's loved frogs all her life She didn't mind my warts at all And she became my wife