The Walls Within

My mind is bewildered with strife All my life, it cuts me like a knife I'm sorry that I've given in to grief These desires within never gave me relief These voices in my head, once again, Reduce me to utter dread and then, I'm seduced by lies and abominable passions Pour forth your compassions upon my mind of distractions I'm attracted to the evilness and the malicious thrill within These tall walls are caving in on me through thick and thin I'm coveting change in my life, coveting regretless times I'm jubilant in my pain and strife...haunted by the bell chimes Divorce remorse in my mindset and abort abhorred lullabies Don't give in to the captivity within these walls...you ignored my cries I'm sorry I have to let go and let live now...somehow, I've lost it all when I broke God's vital, vivacious vow Something in me dies and what's been low has been seeking highs How time surely flies when you bid your goodbyes...your wicked farewells and your atrocious sighs I've become someone hideous and so disgraceful inside, I won't lie Right now, I'm willing to swallow my pride and let humility never dry Obedience and gratitude is close to my grasp and I need to hold on to good morals Rebelliousness and bad attitude made me relapse inside times a ton within these walls Profound poverty has fallen upon me and I pray for wealth spiritually I'm apologetic for the wrongs I've done, so I want to set my spirits free I want to be positively happy, is that too hard to ask? Yes, I bask in yesterday's dismay and tomorrow's sorrow I want to be optimistic at last - is that too hard of a task? No, it's possible to do the impossible with His love to borrow I cry for Your mercy and forgiveness of all the wrongs I've done I denied the lies of my youth and the truth is...the war is left unwon I repent of all the sinning I have succumbed to in my foolish decision-making I want wisdom and understanding and I pray away the aftermath of misery-aching I want Love above all Hear me as I truly call Upon the Lord of Accord and look forward to His awesome Kingdom Within these walls, hatred is aboard...I'm abhorred to the core and I hoarded this doubt out of boredom Freedom is far from my reach But, God teaches me to beseech His narrow pathway And His life-giving way - There's relief beyond the grief, even if it's somewhat brief The walls within break before my eyes I've been crying for His Word to save me beyond belief At least I seek the truth beneath the lies His love is everlasting - So unconditionally amazing! The walls within and my past sins Break apart as God's life begins... Happiness and hope endures and wins Inside our minds and hearts in all aspects of life My mind is no longer bewildered with awful strife!