The Strangest Birthday Present I Ever Received

I was brought up on a smallholding when I was a lass We needed something to help us cut the vast expanse of grass I wanted a goat and my parents they agreed We saw one advertised and rushed there at great speed Poor ‘Susie’ lived in a paved back yard Finding her food to eat must have been hard We paid them some money and then the fun began Travelling home in dads Volkswagen van* I sat on the back seat with ‘Susie’ next to me It looked pretty silly – I’m sure you will agree Back home she bounded out of the car She trimmed the nearest rose bush – she really was a star She headed for the washing line and tried to eat dad’s pants It was pretty hilarious – I can still hear poor dad’s rants She was ‘with kid’ and got settled in her comfy shed Her favourite food was bananas she’d eat them all when fed Finally the great day of the kid’s birth did arrive I called them ‘Billy and Nanny’ I was filled with great pride The kids were so cute and we would take them out for walks If people saw us out in the street their eyes would be on stalks The kids they grew so quickly and nanny she got sold Billy stayed a few more weeks but he was never to get old Billy became a problem and was sold off in a hurry I was devastated to find poor Billy was made into curry This really did happen as written - I had Susie for my 13th birthday present The ONLY amendment is it was a VW Beetle not a van * Jan Allison 10th April 2014