The Poetic Blues

I think I self-sabotage unknowingly because of fear So my message goes unheard because I’m afraid to let the people hear And end up drowning in the poetic blues doubting my ability to write about the truth; I dug deeper and deeper into myself trying to write a poem good enough to be free of judgment Then I stepped out on faith and suddenly I was triumphant and my writing grew and I was loving it I had finally passed the fear of speaking and caring about who the fu*c! was judging it As I wait to be inspired for the next poem, I sit and think alone and drown in my sorrows Listening to jazz, blues and a.m. radio trying to find an excuse not to perform at the SLAM because again I can’t think of a damn thing to write….. Drowning in poetic blues Will this be the one that will be thrown away and never be used Or will this be the one that transcends the others and finally prove that poetry is blues and blues is poetry and hip hop and jazz and r&b, Poetry is music and the words dance around in my soul and I am free once they become spoken In the meantime the paper is where the words will rest until the silence is broken Drowning in the sea of proper delivery My voice, my stance, my intensity How will others interpret the words that I’ve chosen so diligently? I wrap my soul around the possibility that none of the words I choose – will keep me from becoming deluged and trapped by the poetic blues Somehow my heart refuses to accept that I don’t deserve to have my words heard and it takes over this whole process No more time for shrinking and feeling less I was born to make my words manifest light I am a gorgeous medium to the truth yeah that's right I was sent here to give you a piece of good news Remember that God is with you when you get The poetic blues