Notes About The Poem

For Sara Jama's  Serpents, Scorpions, Owls Poetry Contest

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The Owl

above the mist of
 kohl tombstones . . .
  moon hides its face

Wind screams through the graveyard,
and leaves on the ground are scattered around old tombstones
where a modern Cherokee man
lies on top of the grave of his dead wife, 
wailing with a passion that matches
the aching tone of the wild unbridled breeze.
Months have passed, and
nobody could trace the secret of her demise.

Fog envelops the cold cemetery.
It’s as if the night has been frightened white,
and the trees tremble in late autumn’s frigid air.
Above the grieving silhouette,
a great horned owl peers down
with deep, bright, yellow eyes
from its perch on the gnarled limb
of an ancient oak.

The man, unaware of the owl’s stare,
continues his wailing, pounding the grass
above his beloved’s final resting place.
Suddenly, the great horned owl hoots.
He looks up to see
what seems to be a glare emanating maliciousness
from the owl’s nocturnal iris.
Acquainted with the superstitions of his people,
the Cherokee cannot break his gaze
from that of the owl.

It cannot be, it cannot be, the man cries.
He is captured by an unshakable feeling -
the presence of a spiteful and unforgiving spirit -
that has been with him for many eclipsed moons.
This time, however, it is glaring down at him
with utter loathing. The owl hoots again.
Dread pierces his remorseful
yet culpable heart.
Seized with angst, he claws at the grass beneath him.
His fingernails cake with dirt.
He must see the face of his deceased wife.
A tightness squeezes his chest as his heart gives out~
the owl hoots its third and final requiem.

the abandoned perch
       as the fog lifts -
             an owl flies skyward
Copyright © | Year Posted 2025

Poem

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Ashley Avatar
April 13, 2025 at 9:39 AM
Dear Andrea, your haibun is captivating with its rich imagery and storytelling. Especially striking was "Fog envelops the cold cemetery. / It’s as if the night has been frightened white" - wow! So creative and vivid! Vibrant haiku punctuate your prose to great effect. Congratulations for your success in Sara's contest. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan
Jama Avatar
April 10, 2025 at 9:24 AM
Congratulations on placing in my contest. I enjoyed your storytelling in this piece. Very vivid description imagery. Immaculate detail. The haikus are my open and end the poem wonderfully. And your opening line "Wind screams through the graveyard, and leaves on the ground are scattered around old tombstones," is my favourite.
Dietrich Avatar
April 10, 2025 at 1:56 PM
thanks so much. I am glad I was finally able to get inspired and think up the owl haibun!
Empress Avatar
April 10, 2025 at 8:16 AM
Back with congratulations on getting placed in saras contest! Well deserved! I loved this haibun
Dietrich Avatar
April 10, 2025 at 1:56 PM
Thanks, Ink, and for the suggestions you gave me
Miller Avatar
April 10, 2025 at 6:51 AM
Brilliant Haibun fantastic storytelling, congratulations
Dietrich Avatar
April 10, 2025 at 1:57 PM
thanks, Terry. I had fun with this.
Jones Avatar
April 10, 2025 at 6:34 AM
What a masterpiece Andrea! I love the imagery and the haikus! I’m sure you will do well so I will say congratulations now! Lol
Dietrich Avatar
April 10, 2025 at 1:57 PM
thanks so much, Karen
Empress Avatar
April 9, 2025 at 12:30 AM
Wow dear sweet andrea This is so beautiful and so engaging and such a dark and moving haibun with such beautiful haiku at the start and at the end! Youv done an amazing job on this prompt theme and the storytelling here is so creative! I love so many lines in this especially how youv ended the haibun with the haiku there! A fave this is for me for sure! Best wishes! Sending you light always
Singh Avatar
April 8, 2025 at 8:53 PM
A touching poem nicely crafted Wish best in the contest 53N
Mckeithan Avatar
April 8, 2025 at 8:40 PM
Excellent Haibun Andrea. I like the tension building to the end.
Dietrich Avatar
April 10, 2025 at 1:57 PM
thanks, Oliver
Mcclain Avatar
April 8, 2025 at 6:27 PM
Wow, Andrea--that is an awesome poem.. right to the bone. Amazing imagery and storytelling! Kudos! Poems like this are kinda why you're the best. -Brian
Dietrich Avatar
April 10, 2025 at 1:57 PM
thanks, Brian. and for the flattery too!
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