Jeannie Cronin Poet Rhyme

Notes About The Poem

 

The Last Moment

Just a young boy 
with my head in the game,
my value of fortune 
far less than the fame.
My buddies and baseball
we're all that I knew,
then fate threw a curve 
when I noticed you too.

Off in the distance 
you silently stayed,
never a word, you just watched as I played.
Would you have smiled
if I looked back at you?
You had no idea
I was watching you too.

Each game on the monkey bars 
there you would sit,
so hard I pretended to not notice it.
Listening clearly to laughing
and play,
then one day I heard your voice 
call out my name.

Heart in my socks and feet frozen in place,
I shifted my eyes without moving my face.
There you were, smiling and waving at me.
With the raise of my hand,
change of plans, destiny! 

The story so goes but in fear I forget
the story so sweet of the day that we met,
my warm colored canvas still moment in time,
before all my reason was being your rhyme.

                             -Jeannie Minor
                                12/04/2015

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William Kelii Kekaula May 6, 2019 at 5:06 AM Very beautifully said! Nice work!

Daniel Turner March 5, 2016 at 5:51 PM Lucky guy! Enjoyed the read. Peace my dear:) Jeannie Cronin March 6, 2016 at 2:45 AM It was a fun and interesting contest.

Skat A December 16, 2015 at 9:15 PM JEANNIE :) CONGRATS ON YOUR WIN...... SKAT Jeannie Cronin December 16, 2015 at 9:45 PM Thanks SKAT

Lin Lane December 16, 2015 at 5:04 AM Well crafted, Jeannie. First love..sigh. Congratulations. Jeannie Cronin December 16, 2015 at 8:19 AM Thanks, Lin. Always nice to hear from you.

Keith Bickerstaffe December 7, 2015 at 2:05 PM BRILLIANT Jeannie! Beautifully written with skillful rhyming and smooooth flow. Such a well developed story with a saaad ending! BRAVO YOU!! Best wishes, Keith Keith Bickerstaffe December 7, 2015 at 3:19 PM It would be tough to make it any better without real, substantial change... and I think that would spoil it. You a true Creative writer! Keith Jeannie Cronin December 7, 2015 at 3:16 PM Thank you, Keith. I had so much fun with this. Unfortunately, I didn't read Eve's blog that had given a bit of background info on her painting before I wrote and submitted. Definitely would have impacted my creative direction!