The Funny Farm

The love we shared is now no more.
    With bitterness she slammed the door.
She said I've had enough I'm through with you.
   I'm tired she said of the things you do.
You have no respect for me at all.
   And when I talk to you it's like talking to the wall
She said you go ahead and lead your life of fun.
   You're nothing but a low life and a son of a gun.
Those weren't the exact words she used right then.
    She called me everything from being my own next of kin.
That was just a warm up here she comes again.
    All of this started over me letting the cat get in.
Honey I said as I ducked her punch.
    I guess maybe this ain't a good time to ask you to fix some lunch.
I knew she was mad I could tell she was hot.
    But why is she trying to hit me with that cast iron pot.
She got me on the run as I cut my trail.
    Throwing our dishes as her booming voice it did prevail.
As I locked myself behind the bathroom door, I heard the breaking of another plate.
    She started beating and a hollering and predicting my fate.
As I looked around I realized what I had done.
    I just laid down on the floor waiting for her to go and get my gun.
I laid there for an hour or two.
    Not really sure just what to do.
Well I finally got brave and took a peek.
   I didn't see her around so out the door I did sneak.
Into the kitchen there she stood with a smile on her face.
   She walked over to me and gave me the longest embrace.
She said I made my little sugar burger a cake, his favorite kind.
    She said I'm sure glad I married you you're such an awful good find.
Oh, and by the way that moody thing the doc says it will take awhile but I will be okay.
    Going through the change just a normal day. 

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Copyright © | Year Posted 2010

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Brown Avatar
April 11, 2011 at 7:05 AM
I have stopped by to read some of your excellent poetry today Ron. I hope to be back soon to read more and maybe see some new poems also. I wish you the best with your writing always. Love, Carol
Palli Avatar
February 14, 2010 at 6:47 AM
So entertaining! Loved the humor.
Devonshire Avatar
February 12, 2010 at 1:52 PM
You really had me fearing for your life, Ronald, then we get the classic, witty twist at the end. Hope her moods have leveled off. And it was wise of you to duck "her punch." My brother's wife (when they were very young) chased him with a knife. He ran to a phone booth and asked the police what he should do. They told him to keep running. Enjoyed this immensely! Love, Carolyn
Richards Avatar
February 10, 2010 at 11:34 AM
Oh this is sooo funny!! How many hubbies can indentify with this one?? Too many to count! You better duck each time you enter the kitchen, just in case!! :) Great poem Ronald!! ~ Love, Carrie
Kendrick Avatar
February 10, 2010 at 10:45 AM
It takes more than a little while buddy for it is the rest of her life. Keep the creative pen flowing. Sara
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