The Eulogy

I attended the funeral of an acquaintance the other day. Not my preference for pastimes I hasten to say! But I felt to him my final respects I should pay, And view his corporeal remains and help send him away! I thought I knew the feller fairly well, But as various ones eulogized over that empty shell, I was at a loss as to who they were talking about. The dude I knew stretched out there wasn't all that devout! The preacher talked about him usually sitting in the front pew. Where he got that information I really have no clue, For Sunday morns found him and me on the golf course, And his parlance on the greens was quite lewd and coarse! Another guy got up there and had the fortitude to say, How he supported his family and was frugal with his pay. I fear that scoundrel was a bit too frugal with his bucks, For when he broke this earthly plane, he owed me thirty-five bucks! Mourners viewed the corpus marveling at what the mortician did, Before the undertaker closed and screwed down the lid. As the hearse whisked him away to his eternal rest, I gave him the benefit of the doubt - the feller tried his best! Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired (© All Rights Reserved)