The Christmas Guests

It happen one snowy Christmas eve The snow was too heavy for flight So Santa and those eight tiny reindeer Were stranded with me for the night After hot chocolate we all went to sleep With them on my living room floor The reindeer kept passing gas all night And all santa could do was snore Well, I woke up in the middle of the night And those reindeer were all in my bed Comet and Cupid were holding me tight And Prancer was kissing my head Then in a flash the room went dark And in the corner, a tiny elf appears Believe it or not on top of his head He had one of my wife's best brassieres I got out of bed to find old Santa I was hoping he might have an answer I found him soaking in my garden tub Where he was taking a bath with Dancer So I hurried back to the bedroom But my wife was no where in sight I found her in the kitchen playing spin the bottle And that elf said she's mine for the night Well that did it, I finally lost my temper I started screaming for them to get out Santa says, "We can't leave, my clothes aren't dry" And that's when I started to shout He pointed to my fireplace mantle And my stockings were no longer there For hanging on the nail by the fire Was Santa's long john underwear I ran to the bedroom for my rifle But when I returned they were already gone My house was a wreck and that elf stole my wife So I burned Santa's undies til dawn