The Burden I Carry

I had a nightmare, 2 nights ago After 7 hours of fighting insomnia This nightmare was hard to bear though It forced my heart to sink into my gut, and caused me great nausea In this dream, it was August thirteenth The temperature felt 70 degrees, it was bright and sunny My arm tingled from the UV Rays and I felt relief I was in bliss and wanted sugar so I made a wish for some honey But as I made that wish, this dream took a quick turn Prism-like, ominous clouds started to swarm the sky Suddenly I wasnt outdoors anymore, causing me much discern I breathed in through my nose to calm, so I would not cry I was standing in the operation room at clermont hospital center Seems I'm a scrub nurse, considered for promotion to resident But I'm the only one at the table, no one allowed to enter If they helped, the accountable would be everyone present My test was to open a jar that was far from the normal The purest golden honey was inside, but it didn't come from bees This honey, as I was told by my cousin Taylor, afterall Was made of happiness, and that could cure any disease I stood there shaking wildly, Taylor trying his best to advise He was standing on the spectator platform to my rear Since he wasn't allowed to interact, and Taylor has always been wise He gave me a huge grin of confidence, that rounded past his ear Time ticked by, I struggled for 12 hours to open this jar My knuckles on both hands were bleeding and sore Trying to achieve my dreams I had come so far I've wasted my chance, and now it's all broken up and done for The timer buzzed finally. It screamed, piercing me like a wraith Taylor faded away into a puff of smoke and I was in solitude I laid the jar on the ground in defeat, since I had lost my faith The dream faded away, waking me in my current foul mood This poem is a metaphorical explanation Of the burden I have carried for far too long, you see This dark depressing mindset has long since been taken Now I'm beyond help from others, only I can help me Tuesday April 16th, 2019