Robert L. Hinshaw Poet Rhyme

The Art of Shaving

Since time immemorial, or so I've heared,
   Mankind has struggled to tame his beard.
Was it Adam who imposed upon us this atrocious curse?
   (I reckon I could sport a beard but to that I am averse.)
I've scraped and nicked my mug fer nigh on four-score years,
   So I will share my shaving experience to educate my peers.
First, splash a generous supply of soapy water on yer kisser,
   So as to arouse the attention of each and every whisker.
Apply a liberal amount of Burma Shave to ease the stress,
   When with that wicked razor blade yer jowls you do caress.
Twist yer schnoz at an acute angle in order to shave below the nose,
   Taking care not to nick yer double chins and any problems that may pose.
Once this onerous task is done, use toilet tissue to heal the bloody nicks,
   Then apply a liberal amount of Old Spice to really impress the chicks!
(I must confess that I use an electric shaver to mow my intractable stubble.
   'Tis so much smoother on my leathery hide and sure is a lot less trouble!)

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
(c) 2014 All Rights Reserved

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Timothy Hicks October 24, 2014 at 6:50 PM Thankfully I don't have to go through this rigmarole. For 8 bucks I can get full head AND face shave at my local barber :D My friends mock me for using Old Spice, but I still like the scent. Good poem! And nice mention of Adam there... strange how he's always described as being clean shaven?

Arthur Vaso August 16, 2014 at 8:42 PM I loved this one Robert, I now know 100% I am not good at Art at all!!!! Robert L. Hinshaw August 17, 2014 at 7:35 PM Glad you enjoyed the write, Art. Best to you and always happy to hear from you - bob h

Verlena S. Walker August 14, 2014 at 8:41 PM Nice and witty Robert... Enjoyed Robert L. Hinshaw August 14, 2014 at 8:46 PM Thanks so much, Verlena! I'm glad you enjoyed it - bob h

Sara Kendrick August 13, 2014 at 9:42 AM Got a chuckle at what you men must have to go through each day to keep those whiskers at bay..Thanks for the visit to my page..A Great Blue Heron sighting around here is very rare..Some of my family members saw one recently at the creek..There is one that comes there from time to time or maybe it isn't the same one but his ancestors for it has been spotted now for nearly 30 years..Sara

Carolyn Devonshire August 11, 2014 at 7:47 PM Dear Bob, You had me laughing with this one. Just recently I saw a fellow at the supermarket and he'd forgotten to take the toilet tissue off of his "bloody nicks." I do love a beard - perhaps because it hides a double chin. LOL Stick with the electric razor to "mow" your beard :D Love, Carolyn

Andrea Dietrich August 10, 2014 at 5:16 PM haha, Good one especially with the funny references to schnoz and double chins.

Anne-Lise Andresen August 10, 2014 at 1:03 PM - Most men used old spice ("in the old days") ............... all smelled alike :))) - On the soft cheeks I give you a hug - a pleasure to read, bob :))) - Have a nice Sunday - oxox // Anne-Lise :)

Barbara Gorelick August 10, 2014 at 10:49 AM Been gone for a few days, glad to come back to one of your poems that make me laugh...glad you decided to give in to an electric shaver...haha..BG

Nette Onclaud August 10, 2014 at 10:22 AM refreshingly amusing, bob.. you find significance in the ordinary events in life...I remember that old spice scent! much enjoyed and huggs

Dr.Ram Mehta August 10, 2014 at 6:06 AM What nice flow of humor, and that too from Adam to till day, Bob. enjoyed it

Ilene Bauer August 9, 2014 at 7:02 PM wonderful title and hilarious poem to match. you never disappoint, bob, and oftentimes (this one included), my husband gets to enjoy your work when i read it to him. thanks for the smiles today!

Toquyen Harrell August 9, 2014 at 6:59 PM Lol, well thanks Bob. I'll try that haha. I just want to say it sounds so sexy :)

Jan Allison August 9, 2014 at 4:34 PM LOL Robert I love the electric razor confession at the end,, Fabulous write:-) Hugs Jan xxx