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Thanks To The One And Only

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I dedictate this poem for my Mother. Thank you for everything. 

Words of a mother melting your spirit despite it being cold. Her loving you no matter what chasing that heart of gold. "You don't need to be an honor roll student but I love you for trying. I'm glad you're doing great but I don't demand to see an A plus for passing.” Thanks mom Knowing you'll love me regardless. School ain't the easiest thing to progress in. Thanks for everything including this gift of life in which we're seeking to pursue happiness. Apologies to those moments I avoid those arms of forgiveness. Sorry for the times I chose not to listen. Oblivious although it's easily predicted. If I had the chance to change our relationship for the better I would. I closed you to a point where isolation advances towards my adulthood. Shutting those eyes of mine so your shadow can't feel. Dragging me in as it crawls towards my emotions discovering if what's said is real. That I am good. Being crystal clear of the need for some help. Fading away into consciousness while maintaining the problems by myself. Sorry that it took so long to speak. Sorry I didn't do my part if support during false delivery. Pessimistic views yet holding it down like Kimbo. Weak in the bones throwing words as in strength to borrow. Sorry for not expressing yet vomiting an unwanted effort. Buckle down doing what you can, an imaginable love of a shepherd. Having a flock of children Jesus would adore. Broke and paperless success isn't something we're looking for. Just the bliss of being a family member we love. Surprisingly happy yet struggling fits like a latex glove. Hunting for girls which sucks when they're playing with my life like a joker's card. Giving up because like in the wild even a determined hunter quits when he feels it's too hard. So single and sensitive life progresses. Savagely living like John Carpenter knowing breathing is something I'm blessed with. Sorry mom for the things you've been through. Sorry for dealing with suicidal depression through most Of my education and not telling you. Overthinking things with answers faster than Arthur Benjamin. Desperate yet not enough to rent a friend cuz true bonds being bought don't exist. Sorry mom for you to be experiencing betrayal first hand. Witnessing you crying pushes us further yet it doesn't work when we're glued by the ends of a rubber band. Not knowing what to say and so silence takes place. As regretful as Akon from giving you too much space. Sorry for the wrong things that I have done. Sorry for alternating your view on watcha think is fun. Making your choice my choice so you can have none. Sorry I'm not doing what I should be doing as a son. Sorry for having faith in love unraveling my sadness for Elizabeth. Screwing with my head for two years to then always pleading the fifth. Lighting up my face not knowing ignorance outweighs the love within bliss. Abandon our ambition to some random place not bothering to rejoice back to it. As much as it hurts to let go it's hurting more to hold on. My bad I've forgotten family is the best most truthful love out there sorry that it took so long. Like in prison the loudest one in the room is the weakest. Loud in my head weak from the Surface which explains why my kindness is limited yet decent. As humorous as Ron Swanson although I'm unintentionally funny. Not as bad as Amy, no one can be so annoying for such money. Sorry for you to be struggling with life as bad as Patrice O'Neal attempting to by-pass diabetes. Not being able to exist the way we should got you weak in the knees. All up in the mix like a ship in the Rhine. We don't get much luck running out of faith losing our grind. You're doing fine though we got a roof above our heads. Water to drink, food to consume that should be enough said. Sorry you're supporting us by cleaning for others getting pennies for a bit of bread. A jug of milk if lucky under the umbrella of hope placed below our self-esteem yet above the feeling of dread. Sorry life proceeds the same way changing nothing but our view of the world. Thinking a bit too much of how the government takes from us leaves us nearly horrified and scared to unfold. Sorry I can't do anything. Sorry for your sickness. You can't do much at times yet you always let me know you’re sticking with us. Apologies to all things I can't shape into words. Organic lives played by a bunch of marionettes taking turns passing our delicate chords. Things hard to mention not all could be said in color. I love you for being such a great hearted mother. Hopefully I don't come face to face with the notorious banshee. Thanks for everything thanks to the one and only.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2022




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