Taboo
Often times i find myself
Pondering as to what could be
My restless mind files through your folder
Taunting me with what was so close
But unattained
I picture moments that almost happened
And i create taboo images
Even i am too ashamed to depict-
Too afraid my own thoughts will betray me
Eventually spilling my deepest desires
Into a pool of your presence
Yet i cannot control my thoughts this time
I toss and turn in my bed,
Twisting the sheets into a demented representation of my worst desires
Trying to shake my heedless thoughts
Unsuccessful, i allow my mind to venture deeper
Afraid of what i might envision
Yet excited to see the possibilities
My reasoning wrestles with my desires
Fighting to prevent spiking vulnerability from within
And from allowing unruly thoughts to consume my morals
Yet as strong as my conscience may be
Desire pulls at my collar, dragging me deeper
As i slip somewhere i never anticipated
I feel the sudden urge to confide in you
To tell you about my urgent, careless thoughts
To dump these taboo feelings into the pool of your presence
And to spew my vivid imagery into your mind
And here i am
Reminded again that my imagination is not meant to be spoken of
Yet it still echoes in places
Silence was supposed to keep empty
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