Notes About The Poem

Fictional poem for contest sponsored by Sara Jama

Swimming in Grief

It is as if cloudy eyes forecast rain
And the darkest heartache
Bleeds grief like varicose veins
All blue and distorted with pain
Hope is aborted and sadness 
Is a black freight train of thoughts

Drowning my wake my sleep my faith

I try to smile through it but fail 
A grimace of green slides in a wail
Finding no comfort in other widows 
My grief is a powerful hurricane sucking soul
Drowning in grief stuck lamenting
No poem strong enough for venting

Every emotion a shadow of grey
Will I ever find light again in day
Copyright © | Year Posted 2025


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Date: 3/24/2025 4:34:00 AM
"Hope is aborted and sadness Is a black freight train of thoughts".... Very powerful lines, carrying so much weight like the freight train. Dark melancholy rules. Dear Karen, Congratulations on your well deserved placement.
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Karen Jones
Date: 3/24/2025 6:45:00 AM
Thank you Valsa you are kind!
Date: 3/23/2025 10:40:00 AM
Me thinketh you are an old soul and, thus, have the ability to feel what you haven't even experienced in this lifetime. That happens to me, too. This is grief beautifully expressed. I can't believe it sat unread. Congratulations and admiration ... CayCay
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Karen Jones
Date: 3/23/2025 11:17:00 AM
Like you I often emphasize with other’s pain. Thanks for reading and I think it’s so sad that’s is why these type poems may not be read as much.
Date: 3/23/2025 9:01:00 AM
Dear Karen, your poem is a powerful expression of grief. I was especially struck by "Finding no comfort in other widows" - wow! Exquisite pain expressed with finesse. Congratulations for your success in Sara's contest. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan
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Karen Jones
Date: 3/23/2025 9:57:00 AM
Thank you Susan!
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